- Anti-Pickup Line

Man : Wanna go to my house tonight? Woman : I'm not sure if a rock can fit 2 people inside.

he: hey,do you have a phone? she: yeah! why,do you want it? he: no,you should consider selling it and doing a plastic surgery with the money.

man: may I impale you on my stake? woman: O.o (for goth girls)

Eat me, I'm organic!

girl, are you a christian? Sure... Do you believe in me? I dont even know you! Well, met God? No? You love him!

ANYWAY... I have been married for around X years right? (My wife is anon because reasons valid reasons!) And I told my wife "Babe, you know what you got married into baby, how about you and I consider having a third one in the bed... No not a guy, thats disgusting, you agree? Awwride! So anyways, she was like "Uh... Ask me again in a year I need to think things trough, and I want you for myself..." Next week we was fucking my new (back then neighbor) which is 28 or whatever (I dont remember my neighbors name BAHAHA (actual laugher)... Peeps, say what you want about me, ill be the one fucking the prom queen tomorrow... And you know, maybe someone else, sex with more than my waifu the prom queen is addictive, I mean sharing (salive, cum juices) is caring right? Okay, I better stop here, Rebecca (SHADDAP AUTOCORRECT ITS HOW HER NAME IS SPELLED... I guess) is upset... No not because I am typing this, but because I am out here freezing my ballz off smoking her ciggs... Man The great stuff about "decent equipment" is that I dont need all that much energy, just the speed to keep the girls screaming!

-Can I get your Number? -29435566 (see if you can get it.)

I'm desperate, you'll do.

here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

He i would love to have sex with you She. I know but you have aids

How much do you love me? Look at the stars and count them Bu-but it's afternoon Exactly

How much does a whales weigh? How much? Just enough to make you look skinny.

Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

As original as it gets: Domestical... Dog with a top hat and monocle: Yap Yap! wiggles tail woof woof! Dog?: MEOW!! HISS! scratches dog and throws her drink at his face or you know... something that increases dramatic tension and leaves. Dog: HOWL! whimpers :( throws top hat away Moral: They say every dog has his day, but I do not think this relationship was never meant to work out :(

For the males that do not know what I mean with "woman screams" comment below... well HAHAHAHAHAH LOSERS LOOOOOOOOOOOSEEEEEEEEERS! Moral: Read a book about females more interesting parts one day you lazy bastard... as for the girls... I am not talking about anything bad nor dirty... just 12 hour orgasms and such nice things... WHAT? YOU GONNA TELL ME THAT IS HORRIBLE? Well in that case you dont know what you are missing... and you wont ever know.... Ps: Can you believe I am actually trying to get thumbs downs but keep getting upped? Thanks for accepting my ever growing controversial nature, lets keep it that way and soon moral man will uh... receive a medal for uh... well a small keychain for... uh... you know what? Never mind.

Man: Are you a beach? Cause I'm sure there's a lot of crabs crawling around down there

Pointless truth? Man: Hey, there is always a really slutty dressed woman at every bar with a cowboy hat, fake tits and really spread legs, why? Woman: To get ignored. Moral: SUUUUUUUUUUUUURE!

Is that a ladder in your tights or are you just a cheap whore?!

-If I could rearrange the alphabet... that would be nice..

Guy -Are you from Tenessee? Girl -No. guy -oh, because you looked kinda southern.

Male: Paper or plastic? Female: What? Male: Paper or plastic, you know, to put over your head.

Every breath you take Every move you make Every bond you break Every step you take I'll be watching you Every single day Every word you say Every game you play Every night you stay I'll be watching you

My friend and I flipped a coin to see who will ask you out and I won.

(in a bar) Guy: Know how to play any instruments? Girl: No...but I wanna learn. Can you teach me? Guy:Sure..ever heard of the skin flute? Girl: (unaware) No. Can you teach me to play it? Guy: Sure, I can. :) (The girl leaves with the guy as he looks over his shoulder and winks with the thought of getting laid)

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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