- Anti-Pickup Line

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Whatever I'll just date myself.

-How much do you love me? -Count the stars in the sky and you'll know. -But it's the morning. -Exactly.

I'm desperate, you'll do.

Him - Would you like to dance? Her - NO! Him - I'm sorry. I think you misunderstood me. I said, "You look fat in those pants."

He: You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She: You are so handsome when you keep your mouth shut.

-Adam, am I the only girl in your life? -Who else is there?

Excuse me, is the red bike outside yours? Because it is parking illegally, I'll have to take your details so I can report you to the authorities...

male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

He i would love to have sex with you She. I know but you have aids

Pointless truth? Man: Hey, there is always a really slutty dressed woman at every bar with a cowboy hat, fake tits and really spread legs, why? Woman: To get ignored. Moral: SUUUUUUUUUUUUURE!

Male: Paper or plastic? Female: What? Male: Paper or plastic, you know, to put over your head.

guy: hey baby come join the PEN15 club with mee ;) girl: whats that?? guy: come and i will show you...goes into the guys restroom with her....lets go to the restroom and never rest...except you can rest on my PEN15

Man: Hey lady... you new here? I havent seen you around here before ;) Woman: Im your wife! >:/ Man: Which one of them? I have married so many sluts just to get sex with them... that I forget about...

So, you're a girl, huh?

2 fake blondes hitting on me. blondes: we're twins! me: so where are you from? blonde1: canada! blonde2 (at the same time): finland!

My therapist says I should meet new people.

Is that a ladder in your tights or are you just a cheap whore?!

-If I could rearrange the alphabet... that would be nice..

Is that a mirror in your pants? We should have sex immediately.

I walked into the pub last night with a date and said to the barman, "I'll have a pint of Guinness." My date immediately looked at me and said, "Aren't you forgetting something?" "Of course, how rude of me." I said, "I'll have a pint of Guinness PLEASE."

Are you the sun? Because you need to stay about 92,960,000 miles away from me.

Anti-Pickup Line

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