- you're so fat! - I know you are, but what am I? -awwww, thanks man!!! -I didn't mean it like that!

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I just killed my wife. What should I do?

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You seem rapable enough... wanna see some back alleys with me?

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My friends just bet me 50 dollars that I couldn't pick you up if I came over and spoke with you, would you like a few free drinks on their money?

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Man: Lust is a terrible thing! Woman: I agree. Man: So come home with me and help me get rid of it.

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girl - holy sausage! boy - what happen! girl - i broke my foot! boy - oh!

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A: Wanna go get some pizza and then have sex at my place?? B: No.. B: U don't like pizza? Some chinees then?

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *sigh* Did what hurt? (Expecting him to say "When you fell from heaven") Boy: When you broke through the earths crust, ascending from hell.

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Man: Hey lady... you new here? I havent seen you around here before ;) Woman: Im your wife! >:/ Man: Which one of them? I have married so many sluts just to get sex with them... that I forget about...

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Male: Did it hurt??? Female: What, when I fell from heaven? Male: No, the first time you did anal!!!

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A modified classic, props to the original poster: Man: Ask me out! Woman: Ok, get out! Man: No no, I said ASK me out. Woman: Okay... will you please get out? Man: No but thanks for asking me out, I am so gonna tell your friends how I rejected you asking me out. Moral: When beaten... THERE IS NO BEATING! If negative people can turn everything into a loss, thinking positive call help you turn anything into victory. I mean Hitler murdered millions right? Arent you happy (Jew or not), that it was not you? VICTORY! (if somehow Pyrrhic depending on how you turn on it... But if you wanna turn a gain to a pain, go ahead...)

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He says: Are you're from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. She says: Well, if we're making bad jokes: Are you from Illinois? Because you make me ill, and when I throw up from your face I'll make a lot of nois.

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guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together Girl: Its a good thing N and O are already together

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My therapist says I should meet new people.

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Guy - Did it hurt? Girl - Giving birth to my triplets? Yes, it was like shitting a walrus.

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he: hey,do you have a phone? she: yeah! why,do you want it? he: no,you should consider selling it and doing a plastic surgery with the money.

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-How much does a polar bear weigh? -It is impossible to know the exact weight of a polar bear where no scale or bear are present.

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http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

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In regard to the post below. I'm not even joking, one of my mates actually said that to a girl.

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-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

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Guy : your looking well! Girl: awh thanks Guy: You must have shaved this morning.....waaaaaay

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Did it hurt? When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down?

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Man: Do you work at Subway? Girl: Why? Did I just give u a 6 inch?

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Me during the noob days at a bar: Me: So this is fun, want to go to my place and watch The Matrix trilogy all night or something? She: Naaah, I already watched them, but I am sure we can watch something else all night right? Me: Nah, you see I just moved in, and I don't have any other movies, so yeah nice meeting you though! *facepalm*

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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