-How much do you love me? -Count the stars in the sky and you'll know. -But it's the morning. -Exactly.

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Are you from Jamaica because I'm from Jamaica and I think I recognize you? Your ugly as hell by the way.

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He- You've got something on your ass. She- What? He- Oh never mind, it's just a period stain.

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Man: Your body is a tempe! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

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why did the boy laugh? A:he saw another boy get raped by a giant scorpian

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- Hello There Pretty Lady! - Hi... - Wow, your the fist girl I've met who has bigger boobs than I do! - Tw*t

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Eat me, I'm organic!

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Girls hate me, they always discuss about how they regret fucking with me over and over again. Moral: Thumb me down, I know ya love me.

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Him: Nice legs. What time do they open? Her: Members only, I'm afraid,

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Guy: Da da da da da! I'm loving it. (looks at girl's crotch)

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He i would love to have sex with you She. I know but you have aids

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Hey wanna have sex and get married! ......... sorry.......

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-You're fat! -No I'm not. -You will be, when my dick is in you

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guy: you're so beautiful, did you fall from heaven? girl: if I was I would be dead by now hun?

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While I am certain that the police consider you a person of interest, I assure you I do not.

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Man: Honestly! I am just desperate, and besides you are damn hot! Woman: Lets go to your place ;) Moral: This works, the anti-part is that no one will believe me nor try it themselves... Incredible how the easiest way is the least used...

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- Are you from Tennessee bec- - Yes

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and G and L and Y together because that is what you are.

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Girl: Hey, why don't you and I go out to dinner? Guy: Thanks, but if I wanted to watch a whore stuff her face full of meat, I'd just load up Redtube.

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I am Lucifer, my color is blue I already got my queen TO HELL WITH YOU! Moral: Know my name and fear it, I am now and forever.

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Guy: Have you ever been to Thailand? Girl: No Guy: Well maybe I should take you to Bangkok

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girl- how much does a polar bear weigh? girl- enough to break the-- boy- Are you talking about an adult polar bear? boy- then it's around 400-500 kg girl- blast!

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Sorry i only sleep with dead bodies.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!