Have you just been fishing? The strong fishy smell seems to be coming from you.

You seem rapable enough... wanna see some back alleys with me?

Man trying to be smart: Man: HELP THERE IS A GIANT BOMB DOWN MY PANTS! ITS BULGING AND ITS GONNA EXPLODE KILLING US ALL! Nurse: ILL REMOVE IT! GRABS "EXPLOSIVE EQUIPMENT" AND RIPS IT OFF" Nurse: Weird this organic bomb looks like a peni.. Man: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGG Moral: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRHhhhhhhhhhhhhhgEsgRSGRSRfRSfSFSr

Why did the chicken cross the road? -To get to the other side.

Male: Did it hurt??? Female: What, when I fell from heaven? Male: No, the first time you did anal!!!

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When you burst through the asphalt, emerging from the depths of hell.

You want to sleep with me and i want to sleep with you. I'm at least half right.

Guy - Did it hurt? Girl - Giving birth to my triplets? Yes, it was like shitting a walrus.

Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

-You're fat! -No I'm not. -You will be, when my dick is in you

Guy : your looking well! Girl: awh thanks Guy: You must have shaved this morning.....waaaaaay

Man: I am willing to give my life for you. Woman: How about you fucking get one instead and rather seek me out then? Moral: M-M-M-Morale breaker!

Hey giiiiiiiiiiirl, I'm no Flinstone but I can make your bedrock.

Nero: My name is Nero... Woman: Why I mean you aint black? Nero: Sure about that? Moral: In the Darkness... We are all the same...

If I could rearrange the period table, I would put Uranium and Iodide together ;)

so how long have you been a bald ghost wombat?

Do you know why I know we're going to have sex tonight?

guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together Girl: Its a good thing N and O are already together

What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

You are almost as beautiful as my mother.

Your the penisbutter to my vagmite;)

HEY BITCH! GET YOUR ASS HOME AND GIVE ME A THUMBS UPS AT HORSEHEAD NETWORK! Moral: And be rewarded ;) (unless you are fucking ugly, then you still get the gift of voting me whatever way you want)

Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

Roses are red Violets are blue Go out with me Or you face'll be those colors, too!

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!