-Your the hottest girl i have ever met -I'm a man

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I am Lucifer, my color is blue I already got my queen TO HELL WITH YOU! Moral: Know my name and fear it, I am now and forever.

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-Hey baby, are you from Tennessee? Because you're like a solid 7.

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- you're so fat! - I know you are, but what am I? -awwww, thanks man!!! -I didn't mean it like that!

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roses are red violets are blue i have a knife get in the van

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I thought you were cute, so the voices told me to come say hi.

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Those pants are very becoming on you, of course if i were on you id be cumming too.

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Ay Girl. Lemme squirtle on yo jigglypuffs

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Male: "Why does it feel like the most beautiful girl in the world is in this room?" Female: "Because you're here"

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My friends just bet me 50 dollars that I couldn't pick you up if I came over and spoke with you, would you like a few free drinks on their money?

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Him - Would you like to dance? Her - NO! Him - I'm sorry. I think you misunderstood me. I said, "You look fat in those pants."

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Every kiss begins with K ;) Yeah to bad ugly begins with U

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Boy- Didi it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until i saw you.

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I think I shit myself

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I just killed my wife. What should I do?

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Hey giiiiiiiiiiirl, I'm no Flinstone but I can make your bedrock.

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Are you Jamaican? Because I love black women

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A: Wanna go get some pizza and then have sex at my place?? B: No.. B: U don't like pizza? Some chinees then?

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You seem reasonably clean, which is always an important consideration for me when selecting a woman.

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Man: Would you like to dance? Woman: Hell No! Man: I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said - You look fat in those pants!

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Guy:I got stds! Wanna do it? Girl:what the f*** did u just say?guy:oh std ummmm save the dogs?uh ya that save the dogs I own a animal shelter! Girl:I'm not stupid guy: u sure? (Slap)

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Dude: Did you fart? Girl: No Dude: Oh I'm sorry because you blew me away

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Man: Hey babe ;) I may not be the smartest guy around, but look at these muscles! (flexes like crazy). Girl: Sorry, I am blind... Man: Oh... do you hear my sexy raspy voice though? Girl: Sorry I am also deaf... Man: Oh... (leaves) 2 Weeks later: Man: HEY THAT WOMAN TRICKED ME! SHE SAID SHE WAS DEAF BUT WAS CAPABLE OF SPEAKING! DEAF PEOPLE DO NOT SPEAK!.... I think...

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http://pirater-gratuit.fr hacker un compte fb

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!