Have you just been fishing? The strong fishy smell seems to be coming from you.

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I walked into the pub last night with a date and said to the barman, "I'll have a pint of Guinness." My date immediately looked at me and said, "Aren't you forgetting something?" "Of course, how rude of me." I said, "I'll have a pint of Guinness PLEASE."

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Male-where have you been all my life ? Female-not in it thats for sure Male-i was singing a song i wouldn't want YOU in my life Female-i was singing a song 2 *lies*

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Mario: Its a me Mario! Woman: Uhuh... Mario: Its a me Mario? Woman: Yeah you got a point? Mario: Okey dokey! Woman: So? Mario: Letsa go! Woman: Well okay, I mean *chews bubblegum* at least I know who you are and stuff... Moral: I once saw a red mushroom come out of a question block, so I just touch it with my Richard and... ...Wait ill take the green one, just in case, I good with what I have...

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I wish I was your math momework, because then I would be really hard and you'd be doing me on the desk.

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guy: you're so beautiful, did you fall from heaven? girl: if I was I would be dead by now hun?

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I just killed my wife. What should I do?

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Are you doing push-ups with your knees down? Cuz im not sure if this is working out.

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There must be an angel missing from Heaven, because I've got it tied up in my basement. (It keeps saying something about a fancy dress party, but I'm not falling for that one again; that's how Batman escaped.)

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Man: Wow girl, you are so hot you remind me of my wife when she was young.. wanna come to my place for a quick one before she comes back? Girl: Sigh... this AGAIN? I told you! If you are gonna get that drunk, get out of our home and go to a bar daddy!

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He-Are you from Tennesse? Still He-Cu'z I wanna suck ur face off..

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Man: Hey lady... you new here? I havent seen you around here before ;) Woman: Im your wife! >:/ Man: Which one of them? I have married so many sluts just to get sex with them... that I forget about...

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here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

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And then it hit me.....no really now I'm bleeding

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Man: What did you say this horrible machine did look like? Woman: It was terrible it was like a man sized yellow and red robot that shoot lasers! After I refused its offer to come home with him he shoot lasers and destroyed my house... buah ;( ;( Man: That is terrible! Despicable! We have to do something about this! Such a beautiful supermodel should never go trough such a terrible atrocity! Woman: Buah... sigh... sniff... I know... but it was terrible! Man: so so my lady... you can come live with me in my giant mansion and we can have a couple of drinks to calm your nerves and relax... ;) Woman: Thank you Mr.Stark... Man: Oh Just call me Iron Ma... I mean Tony!

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why did the boy laugh? A:he saw another boy get raped by a giant scorpian

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Man: I would kill anyone at anytime for a kiss from you. Woman: Kill yourself now.

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Guy: You look like a suitable mate and I'd thoroughly enjoy engaging in rough, sweaty sex with you and your lady parts.

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-Heyyy there (; -Im lesbian.

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Boy : Gurle: hi

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I thought you were cute, so the voices told me to come say hi.

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(boy gives flowers to a girl) Girl: Are these for me? Boy: Nope, I just want you to hold them for me for a second..

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Ay Girl. Lemme squirtle on yo jigglypuffs

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Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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