Whenever I look at stars I think of you... Because your only beatiful from a distance.

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male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

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roses are red violets are blue i have a knife get in the van

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Man: Your so hot, i think heavens missing an angel Girl: ... Man: ... Girl: ... Girl 2: Sophie turn your hearing aid on Man: oooh.

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The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

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Tenth year anniversary Marriage. So what was your name again? Annoying Bitch? Old Hag? I forgot...

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Girl: Hi honey, wanna see a magic trick? Boy: Sure, why not? Girl -POOF- YOU'RE SINGLE!

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He - Nice shoes. She - Thanks. He - But i think they would look better in my pants.

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Man: Wow you are my cousin? Damn girl you are hot! I mean nothing wrong you know, I was just wondering if you wanna get a innocent cup of coffee Woman: Uh, thanks, but I have never met you... Man: Not my cousin? Bah, what a turnoff im outta here... Moral: Yeah moral... Pffft! You will have an easier time finding Waldo here.

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- I would love to get into your pants... - You can't: I have an asshole in there already.

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-Good thing I brought my library card, 'cause I'm checking you out! -What a shame, it's expired.

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- So, wanna go back to my place? - Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock? -That depends on the size of the rock. -You don't really get it, do you? -Get what?

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I really should start saying "congratulations" instead of "are you keeping it?"

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Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Sorry i only sleep with dead bodies.

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Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Yeah sure, ill just go grab my gag and handcuffs. Male: ...

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Violets are blue. Roses are red. Your window was open. I'm under your bed.

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- Professor Dumbledore, where are we? - You're dead, stupid. Snape trolled you.

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Handsome rich looking man: I would like to take you somewhere nice, maybe watch a movie at the cinema, then we could go to my place and have a romantic dinner.. finally... Girl: YES YES! Man: as I was saying... Finally I can make sweet love with your dog...if its fine by you... Girl: wtf?

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Don't turn this rape into a murder.

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jack sanders

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Hey, Are You From Tennessee, Because Your License Plate Says Tennessee.

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Man: I would kill anyone at anytime for a kiss from you. Woman: Kill yourself now.

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A cat falls into a pool and a rooster laughs. Moral of the story, a wet p**** makes a happy c***

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Man:Are you in college? Woman:Yeah. Berry College. Lots of cows... Man:Well my name is Murad. You know, like, Moo to the radical. Moo, like, cows...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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