- Anti-Pickup Line

Fear not moral man is back, in a moment of weakness I let myself go... let us put it this way... some like me, some hate me, that is what happens when people such as I speak their opinion. And if someday the entire world wants to destroy Moral Man... Moral Man will unleash doomsday! Moral: I am back, like me, hate me, you can still ignore me... but until I get some sleep and can start working out again (icy weather is not for bicycling is it?) Then Moral Man stands... Ps: Hey, thanks there below, my most thumbed up comments had minus 5 and such, so I got kinda down since I thought the internet too needed someone that speaks his mind. More Morals: But then I remembered I do this to entertain myself, and that you downvoters can all go screw yourselves! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAN! MORAL MAAAAAAAAN! Action figures in store now!

A couple wanted to try something different in the bedroom, The wife suggests they do it in a 69 position so they get into position but the wife lets one off in the husbands face she apologises and they try again when the wife farts again the husband gets up to leave and says no I don't think I can do this another 67 times!

Are you jamacian? Cause your jamacian me crazy? no you're a fucking whore

Yo wazzup hoes? You knew black guys have the biggest dicks ever? ;) Uh, so what? You are white. Oh... yeah... Moral: Damn wiggers.

Do you know why I know we're going to have sex tonight?

Man: Would you like to dance? Woman: Hell No! Man: I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said - You look fat in those pants!

Male: Paper or plastic? Female: What? Male: Paper or plastic, you know, to put over your head.

I think I shit myself

Hey, wow you almost typing as much as Nero here, you almost an "Alpha Leader of men" now... But I am sixteen years younger than you (still old) And "Alpha man, leader of women right to my bed. Gonna lie down here til i die probably, Ill be honest, never had to try viagra before, but man it works when I just want to sleep, so if I die, my wife or this (just friend of hers) can give you the 7 keys you will need to get the car (its a mess, guy like you could just break down the damn walls,but my uppercuts you gonna get DAD... Seriously, ill pay the bills, but I am just gonna go for hardcore bruises. As for party or whatever, ill take some time off whenever i can, and send you a message uh... Ill put it in your "OMG SAMSUNG" which ill send trough... Some guy will show up with it, mafia (jk). Between you and me... AND EVERYBODY ELSE IN THE WORLD! This uh, lady, is so fucking sex starved that I am starting to feel like I am just pity fucking her, I mean I am just lying here, but viagra? Thats for old people! And for... You know, big tits hanging over my face for... nearly seven hours? Man I am keeping this one, she has the stamina of a damn Yep she is a uh those that work out, not gymnast, whatever im sleepy as hell, man... I am death destroyer of worlds, and if i die now, I die... Well I can do a little better, but you know top ten something... Ok, seriously, REdhair, do not invite redhair, that asshole hits on my girls when he is drunk and it would be fine if my girls chose to skip over to him, but he is getting nasty. Dibs on this one man, I mean I dont want stuff you have banged, we all know you dont got that luxury, man you are too shy... Anyway, I am getting sick here, so I am gonna take a nap while this bitch moans to herself (forget I said bitch, its just that im tired and yeah wont even delete it) No replies, just get over here you know... Today because the lock system is complicated and I honestly dont know how to open the fucking garage doors, but old Tim knows, and he is here fixing my uh off brand Jacuzzi (bubblebath? The fuck I know), and he can do it, but he leaves in... Hell ill convince him to stay, he is a cool dude. If you cant come today though, tell me when you can and ill see what I can do... And seriously do not respond, for this viagra, man I had no idea how powerful it was and how close this is to killing me... BUT MY BODY IS READY! Okay, whiggs, all but redbeards, and that bald FØCKER that kept PRETENDING like he was drunk yeah, that asshole that kept touching my Wife and my WAIFU`s tights, thats sacrilege, his redemption is only death by stoning. Got the list ready? Redbeard and that bald fuck whose name I do not know, you know the one i... "accidentally" elbowed out the window? Moral: Random message... THE ELBOW WAS NOT RANDOM... Now read and absorb, and meditate upon these wise teachings... For by followin my footsteps, you can fuck forever with whoever and marry two women because MONEY + LAWYER + NOW I AM JUST BRAGGING BECAUSE "ERICSEN" IS READING THIS SHIT... And of course, never invite Eriksen... (HELLO ERIKSEN! BE AS PISSED AS YOU WANT, BUT I AM STILL YOUR BIG BOSS/EMPLOYER. Moral2: Horsehead can hate Moral man, Moral man dont even make fun of them being Jelly anymore, Nero the Moral man has ascended beyond humanity... Moral 3: Eriksen, you know that if you end me another threat like that again, the firm rules/LAWS OF NERO, requires that I fire you... I mean Sorry man, I did not make the rules... I JUST MADE THEM! Oh Harris, you get it if you stay the fuck away from my ascended supersayan feet, I recall something about you kissing them for a car, lol get your faggotry outta here, oh, and bring the partystuff, I just got... Sigh part of me wants to be subtle... GANGBANGING EQUIPMENT!!!!!!!!! And Thats just not apropiate for a party, lets plan this when you get your samsung (OMG) tomorrow or whenever. THE END, DO NOT SPEAK TO THE DARKEST LORD AGAINETH, HE IS TIRED AND ENJOYS BEING RAPED BY MARRIED BITCH WHoSE HUSBAND... Probably dont even have a swagger... This is abuse now, bitch dont even drink water... just typing shit now, and they call me Brutal (Metal you know) woha... Ask that dude timmy or what his name is again to let you in, me? I am ready to get fucked to death... Remember, if I die, I will return in three days, take with me the four musketeers or whatever, and defeat... Chuck Norris, yeah... THE END! (APPLAUSE!) Whiggs, you are depraved, if this bitch fucking a corpse (fuck I said bitch again) when you arrive, prevent the necrolepsy or whatever the name was, and you keep fucking her... You aint got the powah, but at least you be alive.

Are you doing push-ups with your knees down? Cuz im not sure if this is working out.

Man with huge arms and HUGE muscles enters a... pub! (for variety`s sake) "Hey you like fisting!" Woman: Yeah kinda.. I mean HOLY SHIT NO! I DONT PLEASE STOP NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH! Moral: Get a room you two! (a moral man original)

-Is there anything I can do for you? -Fill my care cup. Oh, actually, I don't think you can manage to do that.

guy: ermm...i like blondes ;) ima blonde too...we r a perfect dumb blonde match!!!! girl: yeah but im the dumb one in this situation. and have u taken a look in the mirror lately?!?! guy: yeah...well...uhh...maybe.........no not really... girl: well first of all you got pimples the size of mars, you have cross-eyes, you nose is bigger than squidwards nose, and let me see ur d!ck...now!!!! guy: oooh getting right to the point!!! i like it unzips his pants and pulls out his nub girl: uhh well u aint got no point, it looks like ur point just broke... guy: well midgets cant help it!!!!!!!!! dont judge my falses!!!!!! girl: okayy...besides theres wayyy too much to judge...no point...ur a complete waste of my timee!!!!!!!! now go watch porn and see if it grows a little bigger than his little nub u got.

H3LL0 Girls, You need some THERAPEY? Call Nero The Moralman For A qualified TheRapist. The number? You wont get it, so then you will go mad with lust and need therapey Moral: Ooooh... I says ANTI Pickup line... Whats that? More Moral: Nothing is immoral! Everything is Moral MORAL MAN!

-Roses are red, violets are... -SHOW ME YOUR TITS

What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

I may have never fcked a 10 before, but I did fck five 2's.

It's not Rape* If you yell surprise.

Why didn't the boy make the soccer team? He missed the tryouts

I DROPPED MY LAPTOP IN THE RIVER IT WAS ADELE ROLLING IN THE DEEP ( A DELL ROLLING IN THE DEEP)

Waiter- For you, sir? Male: I'll have a Strawberry Daquiri, non-alcoholic, please. Waiter- And, for your company? Male: For her, a long-island-iced-tea, with a twist of Rohypnol.

will you marry me

Hey, Are You From Tennessee, Because Your License Plate Says Tennessee.

Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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