I understand why you not married!, you snort and farting all night, bye

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I might not be the best looking guy here but im the only one talking to you

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You seem reasonably clean, which is always an important consideration for me when selecting a woman.

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The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

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- Professor Dumbledore, where are we? - You're dead, stupid. Snape trolled you.

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- I would love to get into your pants... - You can't: I have an asshole in there already.

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Violets are blue. Roses are red. Your window was open. I'm under your bed.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? What you don't know? In this day and age? Don't you have like google or something on your smart phone. geeeesh!

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Whenever I look at stars I think of you... Because your only beatiful from a distance.

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Handsome rich looking man: I would like to take you somewhere nice, maybe watch a movie at the cinema, then we could go to my place and have a romantic dinner.. finally... Girl: YES YES! Man: as I was saying... Finally I can make sweet love with your dog...if its fine by you... Girl: wtf?

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roses are red violets are blue i have a knife get in the van

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MAN: You wanna know what's beautiful? Read the first word again. WOMAN: You wanna know what's desperate? Read the first word again!

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Girl: Hi honey, wanna see a magic trick? Boy: Sure, why not? Girl -POOF- YOU'RE SINGLE!

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What did the blond do when the web page she was visiting didn't load? She checked if her wireless access had been somehow cut off and then hit the refresh button and waited for the page to load again.

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Guy: Is it hot in here or did i just break the ice? Girl: No, it was your weight.

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Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Sorry i only sleep with dead bodies.

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Sorry Nero, this is still Golgo 12, I am trying to reach you here as the other place is down, I can see why some people consider you insane, sorry to admit I left the order by the time you left as well, Eliza was the only one that could keep up with your stuff, the rest well you know... So point zero is some kind of elysum now huh? For real? And you rule there? I mean I never doubted your wisdom, but six million people living some kinda new world order at point zero? Thats hard to believe.

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the word of the day is legs lets go to your house and spread the word

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He - Nice shoes. She - Thanks. He - But i think they would look better in my pants.

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guy: you're so beautiful, did you fall from heaven? girl: if I was I would be dead by now hun?

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Man: I would kill anyone at anytime for a kiss from you. Woman: Kill yourself now.

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A cat falls into a pool and a rooster laughs. Moral of the story, a wet p**** makes a happy c***

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Girl: If you was a rollercoaster...I'd ride you all day long.. Guy: What? Am I not big enough for you now...why can't you just be happy with me... =_= Girl: : / I was tring to be all sexy in a cute way... Guy: Pfft. FREAK... e_e

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MAN- You're trying to imagine me naked aren't you? WOMAN- No. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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