here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

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Miss excuse me but... Moral: Admitt it fucker, you cant pick up a girl by apolgizing for whatever you are gonna do beforehand. GIMME FIVE! (red thumbs, red is the color of love or something)

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the word of the day is legs lets go to your house and spread the word

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Tenth year anniversary female edition: Love, for each day my love grows stronger for you. Too bad honey, I married a old man and was hoping you would be dead by now. Oh! What a shock! Do you really mean that? Sigh... No, whispers: I was just hoping that would give you a stroke that's all) What was that last thing you said? Nothing "dear" Moral: Cyanide, just mash the seeds of six apples, use a syringe and presto! Dead family!

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- You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -No, your mind is so small I can't even take a step in it!

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- Professor Dumbledore, where are we? - You're dead, stupid. Snape trolled you.

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Lets play the Yes/No game the rules are you can only say yes or no once to the questions, No. 1 Are you beautiful?, No.2 Are you Lying?

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Are you from hogwarts, because I really want to put my basilisk into your chamber of secrets

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Man: May I have this dance? Woman: Take it, it's all yours [goes away]

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As original as it gets: Domestical... Dog with a top hat and monocle: Yap Yap! *wiggles tail* woof woof! Dog?: MEOW!! HISS! *scratches dog and throws her drink at his face or you know... something that increases dramatic tension* and leaves. Dog: HOWL! *whimpers* :( *throws top hat away* Moral: They say every dog has his day, but I do not think this relationship was never meant to work out :(

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Male: hey sexy whats your sign? Female: dead end!

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-Are you free anytime soon? -No. I'm very expensive

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"Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material." "I'm vegan."

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Hey baby, have you ever been to Uranus? No? Well I am about to.

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Hey baby, I wanna solve your equation with longggg devision! ;)

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Hey girl, you must have fallen from heaven, because you're so old you should have died already and so ugly that they must have kicked you out as soon as you got there.

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- So, wanna go back to my place? - Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock? -That depends on the size of the rock. -You don't really get it, do you? -Get what?

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Hey, Are You From Tennessee, Because Your License Plate Says Tennessee.

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A cat falls into a pool and a rooster laughs. Moral of the story, a wet p**** makes a happy c***

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He - Nice shoes. She - Thanks. He - But i think they would look better in my pants.

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Are you jamacian? Cause your jamacian me crazy? no you're a fucking whore

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Have you ever heard of World of Warcraft?

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Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Sorry i only sleep with dead bodies.

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In regard to the post below. I'm not even joking, one of my mates actually said that to a girl.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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