- You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -No, your mind is so small I can't even take a step in it!

Hey baby, have you ever been to Uranus? No? Well I am about to.

Man:Are you in college? Woman:Yeah. Berry College. Lots of cows... Man:Well my name is Murad. You know, like, Moo to the radical. Moo, like, cows...

A cat falls into a pool and a rooster laughs. Moral of the story, a wet p**** makes a happy c***

Guy: Da da da da da! I'm loving it. (looks at girl's crotch)

I take the the out of psychotherapist

here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

- Professor Dumbledore, where are we? - You're dead, stupid. Snape trolled you.

Man: Hey, I write the most perverted mini stories on ANTIPICKUPLINE ;) Any woman: ME SO HONNY ME LOVE YOU LONG TIME! Moral: Hentai keeping peop... never mind... not into animated cartoons DO YOU THINK I AM A PERVERT OR SOMETHING?.. cant help it that my mother looks like a damn hot pornstar though...

-Are you free anytime soon? -No. I'm very expensive

Hey baby, I wanna solve your equation with longggg devision! ;)

Yo wazzup hoes? You knew black guys have the biggest dicks ever? ;) Uh, so what? You are white. Oh... yeah... Moral: Damn wiggers.

Sorry Nero, this is still Golgo 12, I am trying to reach you here as the other place is down, I can see why some people consider you insane, sorry to admit I left the order by the time you left as well, Eliza was the only one that could keep up with your stuff, the rest well you know... So point zero is some kind of elysum now huh? For real? And you rule there? I mean I never doubted your wisdom, but six million people living some kinda new world order at point zero? Thats hard to believe.

Guy: You look like a suitable mate and I'd thoroughly enjoy engaging in rough, sweaty sex with you and your lady parts.

MAN- You're trying to imagine me naked aren't you? WOMAN- No. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

I might not be the best looking guy here but im the only one talking to you

Why didn't the boy make the soccer team? He missed the tryouts

Have you ever heard of World of Warcraft?

It's not Rape* If you yell surprise.

I might not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you

Boy: did it hurt when you fell from heaven Girl: I'm a antsiest

Tenth year anniversary Marriage. So what was your name again? Annoying Bitch? Old Hag? I forgot...

Are you jamacian? Cause your jamacian me crazy? no you're a fucking whore

*a guy and a girl meet at a bar and has a great conversation* girl - can I borrow your phone? I told my ex I'd call him when I found someone better. boy - sure, here you go *gives phone* girl - *silence* *after awkward phone call* boy - give me my phone back girl - you dont seem to get it do you... boy - give me my phone back girl - *silence* boy - GIVE ME MY PHONE BACK YOU BITCH *boy takes out a shotgun with him and repeatedly shoots girl* *girl dodges and takes a bazooka and aims for boy* *boy manages to get out of the bar* *boy installs bomb in center of bar* *boy leaves bar* *everyone attempts to get out of bar* *boy locks the door* boy - Yippie kai yay, moth- *explosion* *everyone dies* MORAL OF THE STORY - DO NOT GO INTO A BAR

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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