You're too easily offended. I cannot believe you said that.

thumb_up thumb_down

Hey, do you want to dance? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Hey girl! Faggot.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Grapist: I bet you like getting Graped, tied up and beaten muahahahahaha! I am so gonna do the worst things to you! Woman: YES PLEASE! Man: MAAAAAAAAAAAN your not fun anymore... Moral: Its not grape if she wants it... and I guess grapists dont like that... remember that girls whenever someone is gonna rape you just say YES unless they yell surprise though... then its surprise sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Hey girl, do you have a map? Becuase I keep getting lost when i try to find your house.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Does this rag smell of chloroform to you?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

you have your job, I have mine, so let's do it in the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Male: What's on your mind? Female: How bad you must be at sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Did it hurt? When you fell from the hoe tree and banged every dick on the way down?

thumb_up thumb_down -81

Man: "Let's play Titanic. You'll be the Titanic, and I'll be the iceberg making you go down." Woman: "That would be a massive disaster."

thumb_up thumb_down +42

- you come here often? -i used to until you came here

thumb_up thumb_down +4

So when' the baby due?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

do you like cows? no! i am a cow! oh!

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Are your parents retarded? Because you're something special

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Hello I am a violent rapist, oh wait I meant to say my name first and the other much later... Moral: its official you suck!

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Here, flowers for a pretty lady. These arent flowers they are leaves. Well you arent a pretty lady so hah!

thumb_up thumb_down -85

So which of you ladies wants to recieve child support payments from me next year?

thumb_up thumb_down +48

- You're a bombshell! - Too bad it ain't gonna BANG!

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How much does a polar bear weight? Enough to break the ice... and throw you into the freezing water and drown you, because you're really ugly.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

"Do you like me?" "Do pigs fly?"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Nice legs... what time do they open? Cos there is a pungent fish smell and I think you need to wash.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I put the STD in STUD, now all I need is U.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!