So when' the baby due?

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. -Nah, i already like it the way it is, with N and O beside each other

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Male: What's on your mind? Female: How bad you must be at sex.

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Guy - Hey baby, what's your sign? Girl - ?

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Guy: Thanks Girl: Why? Guy: Cuz you made me get rid of that boner

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Hello I am a violent rapist, oh wait I meant to say my name first and the other much later... Moral: its official you suck!

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Man: Hey... wanna join me at my big mansion and have a friendly discussion? Girl: A mansion eh? Well.. sure! At the mansion: Man: MUAHAHAHAHA! I am gonna r@pe you! Girl: NO PLEASE! I am not drun.. uh not ready yet! 5 minutes later: Woman: OUCH! ouchie! That hurts! Stop it! ITS TOO HARD! Man: HAHA AND TAKE THIS GRAPE! AND THIS GRAPE! Oh... never mind this is one has turned a raisin... AND THIS GRAPE!... so uh... anyway wanna move on to the "lovers room" later? Want some more Champagne by the way? AND THIS GRAPE, AND THIS ONE IS REALLY BIG AND HARD! GET READY! Woman: Yeah sure... sigh... just get done with this weirdness already... damn these eccentric millionaires... OUCH! OOF!

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

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- Hey do you wanna hang out? - I'm 17.

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

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"Do you like me?" "Do pigs fly?"

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Hey, do you want to dance? No.

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SEE WHAT’S UP, DOWN UNDER.

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Hi, GET IN THE VAN, Drink this, Don't Scream whisper* "does ur body fit in my trunk?"

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my dick is 2 inches

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-- Hey, can I have your number? -- 12

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Hey baby wanna come back to my place? Goo-goo ga-ga

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- You're a bombshell! - Too bad it ain't gonna BANG!

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Here, flowers for a pretty lady. These arent flowers they are leaves. Well you arent a pretty lady so hah!

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I put the STD in STUD, now all I need is U.

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Hey girl, do you have a map? Becuase I keep getting lost when i try to find your house.

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do you like cows? no! i am a cow! oh!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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