Eyh! its me Black Metal, I seriously cant pay you right now son! Sorry if this comes late this page do not work for shit, (I bet thats why you pick this page you egomaniac son, If you was not full of em charisma id never do this alright?) Okay Overlord, I got your message, hell you know my sister loves you crazy crazy man, why the hell would I try to "hold her away" I mean fuck its banging, so yeah thumbs ups man High five for my sister, its you know, she was super shy before you showed up, now she cant do gym anymore (haha man you so hardcore) but she has lots of friends and you know... So am I absolved now Overlord Black Metal? Moral: Because this guy made me put this, man, you making me feel like a total bitch, good play son!

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Is someone following you? Cuz ive been seeing people behind your back.

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- Do you wanna play the rape game? - NO! - That's the spirit!

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B:wanna go out sometime? G:I'll go out now and get away from you.

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-What's your favorite color? -bl... -mine too! Let's f***

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MAN: hey, are youa gust of wind? cause you blow me away! WOMAN: really? that makes me happy! i was getting kinda sick of you being here!

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Are you a fart? Because you just blew me away.

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Guy: what do this pickup line and your face have in common? Girl: what? Guy: they are both poorly constructed.

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Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

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boy: you remind me of the 20 letters of the alphabet girl: there's 26 boy: how could I forget U R A Q T girl: that's 5 boy: you can get the D later girl: you mean the V?

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Have you been followed? 'Cuz i've been seeing people behind your back.

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Got milk? Cuz baby, im of it!

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Ever kissed a bunny inbetween the ears? Nope. I'm allergic to them.

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Look at the keyboard, u and i are together. Look underneath, it says jk.

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You're so beautiful you could be a tree... Or a high class prostitute

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Guy: Hey babe, do you have a GPS... I'm lost in your eyes. Girl: Make a U-Turn

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MAN: hey babe, do think that mabye someday I and U will be next to each other in the alphebet? WOMAN: well N and O are already, sooo.....

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"How'd you get the black eye?" "I called Yolanda a two-bit whore." "What did she hit you with?" "A sack of quarters."

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Female: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Male: I'm actually a broom in disguise.

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-Wanna have sex? -No -Damn

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Boy: Do u have a pen? Girl: Yeah, here Boy: Umm..its out of ink Girl: What? Boy: It doesn't work Girl: R u sure? Boy: Don't believe me? Fine, u try it... Go on, write your cell phone number right here....

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Man: You like nice guys? ;) Woman: No. Man: *bitchslap* get down on you`re knees and suck me bitch!

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Do you believe in love at first hear? Because ive never dated a blind chick before.

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Guy: I believe in women's rights. That's what women deserve. Girl: Oh really? Because I was just gonna go make you a sandwich and get in bed with you, but I guess not...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!