Pooh... my my... it sure its fucking cold outside, I have cooled down now, excuse me while I get back to... My well... Je ne sais quoi... Allright, foursome sex! There you got it, thumb this bitch down because I dont like bragging, but these girls dared me to do it, and we all gotta provide and share ;) Moral: I am the only man of course feck! The alternative is disguting!

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Boy: I want to get into your pants. Girl: No way! I already have an ass in there!

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Why couldnt susie see out her window? She was not home, see was to busy drowning in the ocean.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, id violate your ass hole.

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Drunk guy with high standards part 3: Man: Dunno woman... you are so big and... and... FAT and really huge and stuff but... well... uh.. you are still really damn hot so lets do it! Man: YAAAAARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! Astronauts: Did that guy really eject himself towards the sun? Moral: At least he was right about the really hot part... and that ladies and gentlemen, is the terrible end of the amazing drunk man with high standards, you can read the whole series just by clicking onwards trough my comments and give em a thumbs ups just as you go along.. otherwise they will show up... mean they wo..

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Man:Hey, do you know what chloroform smells like? Woman:No. Man:Well, you're about to find out.

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-how much do i have to pay you to **** me? -how much do i get for taking you back to the zoo?

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Girl: I was just wondering... Boy: Smell my armpits on July 24th, 2016!

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-Are you a dementor? Cuz you just took my breath away... -Expecto Patronum!!!

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Decaffeinated coffee is like a hooker who only wants to cuddle.

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who wants to play EPAR

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From 1 to America how free are your tonight? North Korea

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Excuse me, does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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Would you like to come home with me you wetback spic?

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How much do you like peanut butter?

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I hope you like trees because I've got wood!

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*When you get her to your place* I'm just going to be honest. I've been on the FBI's most wanted list for quite some time now.

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Guy: I believe in women's rights. That's what women deserve. Girl: Oh really? Because I was just gonna go make you a sandwich and get in bed with you, but I guess not...

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B:wanna go out sometime? G:I'll go out now and get away from you.

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Roses are red, violets are blue I thought I was ugly, but then I met you

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i wanna see your dick? i cant seem to find it...... sorry

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Do you believe in love at first hear? Because ive never dated a blind chick before.

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What do u get when u mix a black a guy and an octopus The best dam cotton pickin machine you'll ever see!

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-Hey baby, what's yo sign? - U Turn

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!