hey did you fall from heaven? because my car is all smashed up.

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Try to put your arm around her. If she pushes you away, then say: "Relax! Relax. I'll pay for the first abortion!"

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Yo imma let you finish yourself off

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You're so hot that if someone threw a grenade at you, I'd probably throw it back because falling on it sounds like a really dumb idea.

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all in all it was a good orgy

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Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: When you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down

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-Are you an angel? -Yeah...actually I am. I remember you-aren't you the guy that fell out of heaven? So THAT'S why your face is so screwed up.

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Hello my name is Horny and... oops... I got it wrong didn't I?

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my number, so shove it up your A$$.

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I don't have a library card but do you mind if I check you out?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have a mac10. GET IN THE VAN.

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Are you a parking ticket because I'm spending all my money on you and wish you were gone.

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Are you on your period, because there's a blood stain on your pants

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Hey, you're cute... lets bang.

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By reason or by Strength, moral man has a serious side too, and I prevail. Moral: Threats... anyone in my unit threatening another would simply be thrown in jail for a couple of weeks, then kicked out, and using military equipment to threaten, trace and murder people is highly illegal. Asshole, troll or not, I will use my right and reason to have you removed permanently from the horsehead network if you persist.

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Girl, do you believe in love by first sight? Uh maybe... Okay, let me see if those titties of you are real or wonderbra or silicone or whatever... Moral: You are fantastic, you know who you remind me of? Myself ;)

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Haven't we met somewheer before? Yes, son.

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Hey girl, I just fuck my diapers, wanna change them ;) Moral: This has to be the one of the worst pickup lines in history.

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Man: "Did you fall from heaven? 'Cause it looks like you landed on your face"

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At a bar. M: I so wanna sex you! W: What? :) M: What part of sex did you not get? VAGINA! W: You have problems with your heart? (angina) :( M: Stop screwing with me bitch! W: I dont have no itch... :/ *The man gets insulted and leaves* Woman: Cute guy, I wish I wasn't nearly deaf though... Moral "patience is a virtue?" Hell no! The guy got laid with 6 women that day so the moral is "The more people listen to what you have to say, the more you will get laid this day, and a deaf woman is a challenge if she aint your way"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

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Hey you must be Jabba the slut from Starwars... why are you crying? Moral: Moral is half the battle

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Q: What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? A: My zipper.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Ask him nicely to come down, and if that doesn't work, he will most likely stay up there.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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