Guy: what do this pickup line and your face have in common? Girl: what? Guy: they are both poorly constructed.

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imgonna r@pe you

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Hey you must be Jabba the slut from Starwars... why are you crying? Moral: Moral is half the battle

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"Have you ever seen a 2-incher?"

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By reason or by Strength, moral man has a serious side too, and I prevail. Moral: Threats... anyone in my unit threatening another would simply be thrown in jail for a couple of weeks, then kicked out, and using military equipment to threaten, trace and murder people is highly illegal. Asshole, troll or not, I will use my right and reason to have you removed permanently from the horsehead network if you persist.

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Man: Hey, I'm Red. You like to walk? Woman: No. I prefer to run. Away from you

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Hey girl, I just fuck my diapers, wanna change them ;) Moral: This has to be the one of the worst pickup lines in history.

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I like your eyes. My eyes don't like you.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Ask him nicely to come down, and if that doesn't work, he will most likely stay up there.

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if I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd put my dick in your ass

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male:hey what that between your leggs female: my sisters penis

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Q: What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? A: My zipper.

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If you were homework, I would slam you on my table and do you all night long.

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Mirrors can't talk, luckily for you they can't laugh either

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Boy: Is your mom mexican? Girl: No/Yes why? Boy: Just wondering.

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At a bar... sigh... Woman: Hey cutie wanna go home? "Man" hello I am twelve... what is this? Moral: Hello I am eight... what is this?

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How much does a polar bear weigh? I don't know. Quite a lot, actually.

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Boy: whats your name? Girl: i dont know, im just s fetus

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Hey! Doesn't this rag smell of chloroform?

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Guy- I would do anything for you. Women- I wouldn't do you for anything!

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Can I have this dance? Sure just give me a minute to load my gun

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Girl: Wanna see my dick? Man: WHAT? Moral: This actually started out as me just mixing up the girl and guy part...

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hello my name is pogo would you like to jump on my stick?

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Every kiss begins with K. Except for ugly, that begins with U.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!