And then it hit me...no really now I'm bleeding

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NO WAIT SON ITS 999 FUCK COME ON! DONT GO "NERO SAYS WITH ME SON!" I mean that shit you pull on everyone, come on man, I posted wrong... Yeah your word is law and all that So can we like make a deal? You pay my repair wreck of a car and you can slash the damn tires yourself if you wanna later?

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Girl: I like a romantic man. Man: oh yes? Girl: Yeah he would have to sing to me... Man: Ehem... cough... okay here goes:Madness? Madness! Madness? Madness! Girl: What? Man: THIS IS SPARTA! THIS IS SPARTA! A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A A-A-A-A-A! THIS IS SPARTA! THIS IS SPARTA! THIS IS SPARTA! THIS IS SPARTA! A-A-A.... Girl: EEEK MY EARS! *runs away* Man: Wait where are you going I am not even finished singing my youtube sparta mix!! Moral: When its hot, they pinch back, *wheeze*

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"Next!"

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Q: Where did Bethany hide the dead baby? A: In the trash can

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Man, stay alive, I dont even got time to read that shit. See you around son.

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Man: Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

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Male- You have 206 bones in your body, You want another ?

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Man at bar: Hey girls... want my banana in your pajamas? ;) ;) ;) Girls: YEAH! Man: "thinks for himself..."... man I never get this reaction from girls.. you are a bunch of skanks and sluts... (leaves the bar) In the end, we are never happy with what we get are we? yeah... this is kinda the moral of this story... (Ps: My banana in your pajamas... I got a girlfriend, but someday Im gonna try that pick up line... hahahaha

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- hey id like my order for you - ok we put extra punch with it these days

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If you were my daughter id still be bathing you

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If I could rearrange the alphabet i would pass on it.

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Were your parents chemists? cuz you look like TEST TUBE BABY :D

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On your mark, get set, suck my dick.

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-If I could arrange the alphabet, that would be cool.

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Damn girl! You`re fat and ugly! its ok though, cuz Im desperate!

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Me: You know what bitch... You are *burp* such a bitch... That I am just gonna smear peanut butter on my crotch and... Lady: Dude, I am a man but okay! Me: You are a guy? Did you have to tell me that? I mean I got beer googles but I hear perfectly well! Then his girlfriend which happened to be my cousin showed up and... *facepalm*

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Man: Hey sexy girl there... Whats your name? Cena: I am John Cena! I can rap because you can eat.. uh crap... wait I need some allsholes to write some rad lyrics for me here...

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HERE COMES NERO! Ladies get your red thumbs ready, guys... Fuck off with all due respect.. To the ladies. Me: Who am I? Woman: Nobody as far a I care... Me: :D MORAL: I am Nobody, Nobody is PERFECT!

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Hey baby, you're really hot, I like girls with some meat for my bone.

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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Hey babe, how about my mom drives us to the comic book store in her Civic? I got a carseat with seat belts for two.

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-Hey comon baby dont be shy give me a little BlowJob -sorry im alergic to peanuts....

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


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