Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

Do you come here often? Because you're usually working the streets whenever I see you.

Want to get a pizza and fuck? What you don't like pizza?

guy: wanna make some money? girl: Na, I do it for free, i'm offering free herpes

Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

Man enters a bar... ORIGINALITY FOR THE PEOPLE! Man: Hey, wanna go to my place later? Woman: Ok Ronald McDonald but you gotta take of your costume first and... Man: What costume? I am Michael Ja.. Moral: Stop it right there! Its too early for jokes about uh... Michael J Fox... yeah him yeah... lets keep it that way...

Farewell to thy, you have been most amusing. Moral: Has left the building.

In a loud bar: Man: Do you enjoy gRape? Woman: HOW DARE YOU YOU PERVERT! Man: Uh... how about raisins then... Woman: Err... can you repeat that first question again... Moral: I would but I would have to bypass the censorship somehow...

Man: Do you like a sensitive guy? Women: Yeah, I used to be one.

Is your dad a terrorist?? 'Cause you're a sex bomb.

adam burdass

Is that a mirror in your pocket? because I can... Yes actually, it's my new LCD Mirror Screen Protector for my iPhone.

Man: Your body is a temple! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

Superman: I bet I can bang you faster than the speed of light! Woman: OOOOH! OK DO IT! Superman... uh... I already did it 30 times already... "pant" "pant" Woman: uh... really? Uh... was I suppose to feel anythi... Moral: Since when has fast sex been good sex?

Are you from tennessee? Because your inbred and retarted.

-Do your feet hurt? Because I couldn't help but notice you look about 75 pounds overweight and I hear that is rough on your feet.

man-hey baby you wanna go somewhere girl-no thanks hells over there

-Is there anything I can do for you? -Fill my care cup. Oh, actually, I don't think you can manage to do that.

Is it hot in here or are you just suffocating me in this relationship

-If I could arrange the alphabet, that would be cool.

Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

Hey baby, you're really hot, I like girls with some meat for my bone.

That outfit looks fantastic on you... ..it would look even better in an evidence bag

Is that a mirror in your pants? We should have sex immediately.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!