Are you a Geodude? Cause you're face is rockin'!

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man-hey baby you wanna go somewhere girl-no thanks hells over there

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Mother: Fuck me son fuck me harder. Me: Mother no! My body is not ready aaaaaaaaaarghhh! Moral: Why do dreams have to stop when it gets good? Dont know son, ready for round two?

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Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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Are you a magnet because I'm attracted to you No, but I am trained in several martial art, so get the heck away from me

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Male: Do you know if there is an airport around here? Cause my heart took off, when I saw you... Female: Yeah? Well my heart crashed in the Hudson River when I saw you!

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"Hey girl, is there a mirror in your pants?" "No, that's just my penis."

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue, Dont talk to me, and I wont talk to you.

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Q: Where did Bethany hide the dead baby? A: In the trash can

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Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: What? Guy:When I drugged you, then dragged you all the way to my place and banged the hell out of your ass? I also managed to get my entire fist in and out of your ass several times. Moral: Wanna go out with me?

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Female: Why? Male: Cus you look like an inbred hick

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Guy: You look two times as beautiful with makup on. Girl: Really? I think you would too.

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You have lovely eyes. They'll look better in a pile on my floor in the morning.

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Hey girl, you a single mom I heard, I love that. Really? :D SURE! Hey just between us, how sexy are your kids on a scale from one to over nine thousand? Moral: Watch out ladies, I can only take care of so many of you... (you have kids? Meh, get lost,nothing personal, just you know... your kid)

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I right next to each other. You say that you want me? Well don't what you come for!!

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I hate you already.

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I have the smallest erected dick in town, if you don't believe me ask my mama!

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Boy: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? Girl: Did it hurt when you were thrust through the ash-filled layers of Hell?

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http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

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Hey baby, are you Star Trek? Because I watch you every night in the darkness.

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On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

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Let's not turn this rape... into a murder

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Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

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Man: Hello! I am SUPERMAN! And you are so hot you are my Kryptonite! Woman: then you better get lost before you die! Man: Uh well... yeah uh... walks away (in non super speed strangely) Moral: Think things trough sometimes...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!