Hey girl, I am a rich guy with a huge estate and stuff, while you live under a cardboard box so... Your place or mine? Both, I to your place, and you to mine.

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Man: Your body is a tempe! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

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-My love for you is like diarrhea, I cant hold it in...

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hey i know spanish french german russian and Punjabi. got a talented tongue ;)

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Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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Order Online Nightwear and short shop online in India

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Man: Hey! Are you into stuff like violence robbery rape cheating orgies machismo torture and pedophilia? ;) ;) Girl: WHAT? NO! Man: Ok me neither so you qualify to come home with me. Girl: Well... that honestly makes you better than most of the lot... why not... so yeah lets go!

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On a scale from 1 to 10, can I get your number?

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Boy- is that a mirror in your pants? Girl-? Boy-because i see my self in your pants Girl-oh this, this is a picture of crap!

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He: did it hurt? She: when i fell from heaven? He: no. when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. go put some clothes on.

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Guy texting random girl: *u must b wearing space pants cuz ur a*s is out of this world *no im wearing baseball pants cuz my a*s is out of ur leage (this girl deserves an award)

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Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: What? Guy:When I drugged you, then dragged you all the way to my place and banged the hell out of your ass? I also managed to get my entire fist in and out of your ass several times. Moral: Wanna go out with me?

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Hey did you fall from Heaven? Cos I think you are angel. If I'd fallen from anywhere that high I'd be in hospital with serious injuries or dead. Do the logic.

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Hey wanna have sex and get married! ......... sorry.......

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How much do you love me? Look at the stars and count them Bu-but it's afternoon Exactly

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Guy: Hey is your dad a jeweler? Girl: No, He died a year ago due to a heart condition.

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Hey I used to be a man, but I'm pretty horny.

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men: Do you ride horses, because I'd let you ride me all night!

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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He: How do you like your eggs in the morning? She: Unfertilised!

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You are almost as beautiful as my mother.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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How much does a whales weigh? How much? Just enough to make you look skinny.

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Moral: Hey, how you doing? ;) Woman: Moral? Are you that guy that signs all his posts on horsecrapz network and adds miscellaneous notes? Moral: Yep that's me ;) Woman: OMG LIKE EWWW! Id never do you! Moral: Uh, when did even make such a suggestion? Moral:Well I am married...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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