Sigh... No I do not have a van... Just get in the plane!

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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Do you work at Subway, because you're giving me a footlong. No actually, I once had a job at a local Quizno's Sub Shop. However a tragic fire killed several employees and customers at this very location. I survived, but lost have permanent Third-Degree burns across my body. My life is ruined, prick.

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Famous male actors guide on pick-up. 1. Enter Disco. 2. Say hello out loud. 3. By this point you`re screwed... literally.

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Batman bravely leaps in front of the Robin: Bats: WATCH OUT FOR THAT GAY-RAY! *Bats suddenly grabs Robin and starts making out with him* Bats: I am sorry, I cannot stop it... I... Robin: I am underage so maybe it was a pedo-ray or something... Joker: What gay ray? What pedo ray? It was suppose to disintegrate you! But whatever, I win. Moral: It was a looong trip back home.

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free candy....

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did it hurt ? did what hurt? when your fell from heaven? because it looks like you landed on your face :O

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girl - holy sausage! boy - what happen! girl - i broke my foot! boy - oh!

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Did it hurt? When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down?

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Guy: Hey babe, does the carpet match the drapes? Girl: How do you feel about hardwood?

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Boy: So...Um...How's life? Girl: Great, until you came along.

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Are you Jamaican? Because I love black women

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Woman- is your penis erect? Male- no just FULL SIZED Woman- woah

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If you were a booger i would pick you Good thing you have no hands

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My friends just bet me 50 dollars that I couldn't pick you up if I came over and spoke with you, would you like a few free drinks on their money?

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Why are you crying? I have to walk out these woods alone!

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H3LL0 Girls, You need some THERAPEY? Call Nero The Moralman For A qualified TheRapist. The number? You wont get it, so then you will go mad with lust and need therapey Moral: Ooooh... I says ANTI Pickup line... Whats that? More Moral: Nothing is immoral! Everything is Moral MORAL MAN!

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-So...wanna come back to my place? -I Dont Know If two people can fit in a box on the street.

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Man: Lust is a terrible thing! Woman: I agree. Man: So come home with me and help me get rid of it.

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Me noob days again: She: So, you like it here sweetheart? Me: Excuse me, why the hell are you rubbing my leg? She: Would you prefer I rub something else? Me: What the hell am I doing here anyways Duh! Then I sober up at home... And ran towards the shower, its really not that easy to drown yourself to death in a shower is it?

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He i would love to have sex with you She. I know but you have aids

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Drunk woman enters what she thinks is a bar... (how original). "man gets close to her" Woman: You men are all dogs! Man: Bark bark! Woman: No need to get cheeky with me asshole! Man: Bark bark... Woman proceeds to pass out and wake up at a kennel... "Mandog": Bark bark. Moral: If you think every man is a dog, then you may just be bark barking the wrong tree... or place... I mean dont expect to find nice men at a dirty bar, and dont expect to find horny jerks at your church reunion. (A moral man original... and I actually like this one!)

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- I put the STD in STUD, all I need is U - ...

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my girlfriend is really insecure about her weight so much so that I'm thinking about detaching the reverse alarm

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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