Guy: Hey babe, does the carpet match the drapes? Girl: How do you feel about hardwood?

Roses are red Violets are blue Im a serial killer So GTFO before i kill you

A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

-My love for you is like diarrhea, I cant hold it in...

Hello im a thief and I'm here to steal your purse

- Yo baby can I have your number? - Sure! My number is one *sticks up middle finger*

Your so hot my pants will explode if I don't take them off now...

-Heyyy there (; -Im lesbian.

Me: Hey lady, you are so fucking hot I want to... Lady: FUCK ME PLEASE ME SO HORNY! Moral: One can always dream... *yawn* Zzzzzzzmooth...

Twinkle winkle little star, cuz my star is what you are... Moral: Heh, that one might actually work if you do it spontaneously and mean it, damn I keep failing at making bad pickuplines, I am so good I cannot fail! I WANT TO FAIL! (Legal disclaimer: Not really I just go hi-wire after... "flirting" yeaaaaaaah lets be subtle now "Moral" Man)

M. Excuse me Miss. You have seamen on the back of your jacket. W. Are you sure? It could just be Yoghurt. M. Most Definitely. I don't Cum Yoghurt.

Charmeleon is Red, Squirtle is Blue, If you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you.

- If i could rearange the alphabet i'd puit you and i together. - That's not necessary because N and O are already together.

Batman bravely leaps in front of the Robin: Bats: WATCH OUT FOR THAT GAY-RAY! *Bats suddenly grabs Robin and starts making out with him* Bats: I am sorry, I cannot stop it... I... Robin: I am underage so maybe it was a pedo-ray or something... Joker: What gay ray? What pedo ray? It was suppose to disintegrate you! But whatever, I win. Moral: It was a looong trip back home.

Man: Are you a beach? Cause I'm sure there's a lot of crabs crawling around down there

Do u remember me from middle school? I could never forget you

you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

-I heard you broke up :). -Yes, cookies to put in my ice cream!

He: Did it hurt? She: When I fell from heaven? heard it before... He: No, when you fell from the ugly tree!

sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

Girls hate me, they always discuss about how they regret fucking with me over and over again. Moral: Thumb me down, I know ya love me.

Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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