- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

Hi there, the voices in my head are telling me to talk to you.

Hey ladies ;) I like to post lots of anti-pickuplines! ;) Girls: WOW! I WANNA JOIN YOU HOME! ME TOO ME TOO! The anti-part: This will never happen in real life.

Ay Girl. Lemme squirtle on yo jigglypuffs

Charmeleon is Red, Squirtle is Blue, If you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you.

Do you know why I know we're going to have sex tonight?

He-Are you from Tennesse? Still He-Cu'z I wanna suck ur face off..

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When you burst through the asphalt, emerging from the depths of hell.

Man: I would kill anyone at anytime for a kiss from you. Woman: Kill yourself now.

Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Sorry i only sleep with dead bodies.

Man enters bar: Man: is there any... I mean ANY woman that would not instantly reject me here? If there is, I would like her... or in worst case scenario, HIM that she/he is very special to me and has the most beautiful eyes ever... THANK YOU

-Heyyy there (; -Im lesbian.

there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

Man: I am willing to give my life for you. Woman: How about you fucking get one instead and rather seek me out then? Moral: M-M-M-Morale breaker!

A: Wanna go get some pizza and then have sex at my place?? B: No.. B: U don't like pizza? Some chinees then?

Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

Your face is like mace, every time i see if i get blinded

Couple in bed: Woman: I want some variation... you into roleplay? Man: Sure! Woman: Ok, Ill be a hot housemaid... Man: OK but they have little mana so... ill be a firemage! Woman: Huh? Man: SHHHH! its not your time to attack yet! Moral: Geeks...

And then it hit me.....no really now I'm bleeding

here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

Girl, wanna fuck rite now? Sure! Man! You are such a hoe! walks away disgusted Moral: Be careful for what you ask for.

In regard to the post below. I'm not even joking, one of my mates actually said that to a girl.

Have you just been fishing? The strong fishy smell seems to be coming from you.

Was your dad a thief? Because he's in jail

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book