What do you get when you cross a chicken with glue? My d***

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I can tell you are single. How? Because you're ugly

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Whenever I look at stars I think of you... Because your only beatiful from a distance.

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Man: Put your face over my fist as I say shinku Woman: Huh? Ok whatever.... SHOOOOOOOOOORYUKEEEEEEN!

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me- hey baby wanna hve sexual intercourse girl- sure because using the word intercourse in a sentence tunrs me on.

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man: wanna know how i know we're going to f**k tonight? woman: how? man: cuz im stronger than you!

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How about you swing by my place so we can do some complex algebraic functions.

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Man and woman in bed: Man: You know I am somewhat a deviant right? Woman: Sure but I am drunk so lets just do it.. Man: I AM SO GONNA BANG YOU! (Man throws dynamite at woman) Woman: WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUU Moral: BANG INDEED... case closed.

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-Your father must be an alien because your out of this world -More like out of your league

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You must be tired... I assume you are because I am after following you on your four mile run through the park today.

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Man: Yoyoyoy my lady wanna get some? Mirror: yoyoyoy my lady wanna get some? Man: SHIET!!! This never works! Moral: Take a look at yourself before you break yourself! By the time you start looking, sounding, feeling and even smelling awesome in the mirror, then the girls will feel the same way about you, no kidding.

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-Good afternoon miss, would you care to try our new line of perfume? -Sure what's it called? -Chloroform...

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-My love for you is like diarrhea, I cant hold it in...

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He: Did it hurt? She: When I fell from heaven? heard it before... He: No, when you fell from the ugly tree!

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Dude: Did you fart? Girl: No Dude: Oh I'm sorry because you blew me away

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sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

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Guy: Is it hot in here or did i just break the ice? Girl: No, it was your weight.

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- Did it hurt? - What? - When you were catapaulted from the firey bowels of Hell?

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Male: "Why does it feel like the most beautiful girl in the world is in this room?" Female: "Because you're here"

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are u an angle because i have a boner oh what fail

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Did it hurt when you fell from the whore tree and banged every single guy on your way down?

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I walked into the pub last night with a date and said to the barman, "I'll have a pint of Guinness." My date immediately looked at me and said, "Aren't you forgetting something?" "Of course, how rude of me." I said, "I'll have a pint of Guinness PLEASE."

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why did the boy laugh? A:he saw another boy get raped by a giant scorpian

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Does anyone have a toothpick? I need to pick the crabs out of the cracks of my teeth.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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