girl - holy sausage! boy - what happen! girl - i broke my foot! boy - oh!

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so how long have you been a bald ghost wombat?

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Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

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Man and woman in bed: Man: You know I am somewhat a deviant right? Woman: Sure but I am drunk so lets just do it.. Man: I AM SO GONNA BANG YOU! (Man throws dynamite at woman) Woman: WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUU Moral: BANG INDEED... case closed.

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here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

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And then it hit me.....no really now I'm bleeding

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Man: Lust is a terrible thing! Woman: I agree. Man: So come home with me and help me get rid of it.

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Man enters bar: Man: I AM MORAL MAN! My spear shall cut down the zealots, and my shield shall block (yeah you wish) be used as a additional weapon to push people down so I can thrust my spear even deeper into their hatred filled hearts! Woman: WOW! Moral: This pickup line wont work of course... not for you you aren`t the one and only EPIC: MORAL MAN! ;) Aka Epic man to those that still fail to understand that my morals are morals for a new order! No more religious wars, no more pedophiles, no more hatecrime... stand by me, and I shall not only speak for you, but also fight for you!

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Can you leave your door unlocked and your underwear drawer open when you go to work?

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Guy: Hey babe, does the carpet match the drapes? Girl: How do you feel about hardwood?

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Huge blue man: I AM THE APOCALYPSE! YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE! Woman: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! Huge blue man: "facepalm" THIS GAME, IS OVER! Moral: Dont start out too strong...

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Twinkle winkle little star, cuz my star is what you are... Moral: Heh, that one might actually work if you do it spontaneously and mean it, damn I keep failing at making bad pickuplines, I am so good I cannot fail! I WANT TO FAIL! (Legal disclaimer: Not really I just go hi-wire after... "flirting" yeaaaaaaah lets be subtle now "Moral" Man)

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When you burst through the asphalt, emerging from the depths of hell.

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I'll eat your poop

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Are you an angel? 'Cause you're the only ten I see.

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Guy: Have you ever seen a rhinoceros? Girl:No. Why? Guy: So you don't have a mirror in your house?

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I have a twin bed...we should have a threesome;)))

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Honestly bitch, I hate you, but my balls are bursting so its either you or the next disgusting ugly bitch in line, my mom!

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Have you just been fishing? The strong fishy smell seems to be coming from you.

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You stole my heart..... Don't worry, i have three more back home in my freezer.

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I walked into the pub last night with a date and said to the barman, "I'll have a pint of Guinness." My date immediately looked at me and said, "Aren't you forgetting something?" "Of course, how rude of me." I said, "I'll have a pint of Guinness PLEASE."

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why did the boy laugh? A:he saw another boy get raped by a giant scorpian

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the word of the day is legs lets go to your house and spread the word

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haha

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!