Hello, it's nice to meet you.

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M. Haven't I seen you some place before? W. That's why I don't go there anymore

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Are you an angel? ... cause I have an erection!

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"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

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Girl are your parents Mexican, cuz you look Mexican.

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Hey good looking, what some mayonnaise?

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Male - Your a sight for sore eyes Female - And your a sight that causes sore eyes

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At some random bar: Man: I am Duke Nukem! Woman: DISGUSTING! Man: Huh? Moral: Sometimes you have to play the new games to understand the old...

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Boy: Are you Mc Donalds? Girl: Why because your loving it? Boy: No because ur fat and greasy!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun so get in the van.

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do you work at subway? 'cause you give me foot long. i'll do you a favour and cut it up

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-hey baby whats your sign? -no parking anytime

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My greatest strength is my self-deprecating sense of humor, but its probably not worth getting to know me.

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If you and I were squirrels, I'd bust a nut in that hole.

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Ever had violent sex with a murderer/rapist? ;) ;)

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Have you heard of that new movie "Other People"? Cuz thats what i wanna see.

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Are you a speeding, aggressive driver? Because your running straight up my ass

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This doesn't have to be a rape.

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Nerdy Pokemon Pickup he: i want to squirrtle on your jigglypuff she: I want to boulder smash your face

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I put the STD in Stud all I need is U

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Not as much as my dick.

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Girl - You smell nice, what have you got on? Boy - I have a hardon but i didn't think you could smell it.

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Man- Hey, baby, wanna come back to my house for some pizza and sex? Woman- No! Man- What's wrong, you don't like pizza?

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him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!