Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

Guy - Hey baby, what's your sign? Girl - ?

Hi, GET IN THE VAN, Drink this, Don't Scream whisper* "does ur body fit in my trunk?"

Excuse me, does this smell like chloroform to you?

You're too easily offended. I cannot believe you said that.

yo im will smith yo, thats my name and I was juzz wonderin if you ever you know like the beach or bbq because stuff happen yanno and while I do some rap id just belieeve that things are a bit crazy these times so I was thinking maybe ill ask you out right? But then I was like WHAAAAAAZAAAAAAAAA and... Hey gurl where you goin im just getting warmed up. Moral: I met the guy, day one I had a great day, day two I didnt get any sleep and now I hate him, the end.

Hey girl, do you have a map? Becuase I keep getting lost when i try to find your house.

Knock Knock... Who's there Want Want who Want who fuck

Hey Baby, Whats your name? Dave ...(silence)...

Get in the van.

My wife does not know it but every time we have sex I put a dollar aside to go toward her Christmas present. So far she is getting a cup of coffee.

Hello I am a violent rapist, oh wait I meant to say my name first and the other much later... Moral: its official you suck!

Does this rag smell of chloroform to you?

- you come here often? -i used to until you came here

"Do you like me?" "Do pigs fly?"

So when' the baby due?

- You're a bombshell! - Too bad it ain't gonna BANG!

Male: What's on your mind? Female: How bad you must be at sex.

Male: Get in the van.

- Hey, baby, are your parents retarded because you're pretty special.

Nice legs... what time do they open? Cos there is a pungent fish smell and I think you need to wash.

I'm your Edward and your my Bella

Man: "Let's play Titanic. You'll be the Titanic, and I'll be the iceberg making you go down." Woman: "That would be a massive disaster."

Are your parents retarded? Because you're something special

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!