Didnt I just meet you at world of warcraft? My nickname is desperaterapist838493

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Dont let this rape turn into a murder

thumb_up thumb_down +19

hey angel you duh sexy , if you duh rice i eat you everyday-pha haha

thumb_up thumb_down -29

“Why, look at me. I've worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.” ? Groucho Marx

thumb_up thumb_down -73

Guy: Can we go on a date? Girl: A date? You couldn't find a date if I handed you a bag of fruit!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Guy: So do you wanna come over to my place? Girl: Not really but thanks for the offer.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

If your right leg was Thanksgiving and your left leg was Christmas, could i come between the holidays?

thumb_up thumb_down +150

Are you from Ireland cause my penis is dublin'

thumb_up thumb_down +102

- You're a bombshell! - Too bad it ain't gonna BANG!

thumb_up thumb_down +30

HE ; " MY NAME'S BOND, JAMES BOND" SHE;" MY NAME'S ****, **** OFF!"

thumb_up thumb_down +53

I think your cute. I though you were cute, until I saw you...

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red, violets are blue I thought I was ugly, but then I met you

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Male: If you were a booger, I'd pick you first. Female: If you were an ass, I would kick you first.

thumb_up thumb_down +100

hey girl, were you in 9/11? cause I'll never forget you.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

If i could rearrange the alphabet, id violate your ass hole.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

-Hey baby, what's yo sign? - U Turn

thumb_up thumb_down -32

You're like a star in the sky. Nothing but gas.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

I want you to come over, so we can go in my room, turn off the lights, go under the covers, and ill show you my glow in the dark watch..just kidding my penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I've got a black belt in lovin'.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Drunk guy with high standards part 3: Man: Dunno woman... you are so big and... and... FAT and really huge and stuff but... well... uh.. you are still really damn hot so lets do it! Man: YAAAAARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! Astronauts: Did that guy really eject himself towards the sun? Moral: At least he was right about the really hot part... and that ladies and gentlemen, is the terrible end of the amazing drunk man with high standards, you can read the whole series just by clicking onwards trough my comments and give em a thumbs ups just as you go along.. otherwise they will show up... mean they wo..

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Decaffeinated coffee is like a hooker who only wants to cuddle.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

rohypnol. rape drug

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Guy: Would you like to dance? Girl: no Guy: Good! Because I have to go take a shit!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!