Im gonna rape you..

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-words can't describe how beautiful you are. -aaaawwwwwwww. -but numbers can. 3/10. -fffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-

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Nice legs... what time do they open? Cos there is a pungent fish smell and I think you need to wash.

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Excuse me, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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- Hey, baby, are your parents retarded because you're pretty special.

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

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Hey, do you want to dance? No.

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HIM: Where have you been all my life? HER: I don't think I was born the first half of it

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In a classy bar: KEEP IT CLASSY! Man: Hello there dear... your eyes sparkle like the sun itself... Woman: Oh... thank you random stranger, that is the most beautiful thing someone have ever said to me :D Man: Really? But you are gorgeous (the two proceed to have a long CLASSY conversation and laughing in a classy reserved matter and drinking classy champagne and whatever... and then: Man: Ahahaha yes that is indeed true... By the way... would you mind becoming the single lonely mother of my children? Moral: skipped most of school classes... class ... overrated...

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#1 You're breath smells like Skittles, can I taste the rainbow? No, because , while mine may smell like Skittles, yours reeks. #2 Girl: Hey, I got this new Kiss Proof lip gloss, wanna try it out? (there are 2 answers to this) 1.Boy: Well, yours may be Kiss Proof, but mines not, and I don't have time to re-apply this after 2. Yeah, I do want to try it out, but not with you.

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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I have a knife and a penis. Choose which one goes in you.

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Do you wanna go halves in a bastard?

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You're too easily offended. I cannot believe you said that.

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"Do you like me?" "Do pigs fly?"

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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What happens if an Internet troll has a heart attack Doesn't matter nobody will care

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Give me everything tonight, or you might not see tomorrow. RAPIST!

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J.B: You smile, I smile. Girl: I wasn't smiling...

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My wife asked me to pass her the lip balm but I accidentally gave her the glue stick, she is still not talking to me.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent sounds stupid.

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yo im will smith yo, thats my name and I was juzz wonderin if you ever you know like the beach or bbq because stuff happen yanno and while I do some rap id just belieeve that things are a bit crazy these times so I was thinking maybe ill ask you out right? But then I was like WHAAAAAAZAAAAAAAAA and... Hey gurl where you goin im just getting warmed up. Moral: I met the guy, day one I had a great day, day two I didnt get any sleep and now I hate him, the end.

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-Hey babe, wanna go to my place and bang all night long? -No you freak. -Well, I gave you a choice.

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Ay Girl. Can I get yo digletts?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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