- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Male: What's on your mind? Female: How bad you must be at sex.

Heard at a bra: Hi I am Moral man, the third most infamous guy at a list where Beiber is first. Girl: OMG I MUST HAVE YOU! Moral: ooooh... ANTI Joke duh... I thought this was great pickup lines!

Guy - Hey baby, what's your sign? Girl - ?

can i austrailian kiss you, its like a french kiss but down under

"Is this seat free?" "Yes, and if you sit on it, this seat will be free too"

Male: Get in the van.

Well there's the exit, will you go out with me?

I'll drop my standards, if you drop your pants ;)

Guy: Are you an angel? Girl: Wait till I die, i'll be one.

Hey girl, do you have a map? Becuase I keep getting lost when i try to find your house.

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

sex me.

do you like cows? no! i am a cow! oh!

Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

girl: i like you boy with downs: i liek trains

Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

HIM: Where have you been all my life? HER: I don't think I was born the first half of it

wow youre really pretty... just kidding youre fat

Nice legs... what time do they open? Cos there is a pungent fish smell and I think you need to wash.

Im gonna rape you..

fancy going halves on a bastard?

Give me everything tonight, or you might not see tomorrow. RAPIST!

J.B: You smile, I smile. Girl: I wasn't smiling...

- Hey, baby, are your parents retarded because you're pretty special.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book