you have your job, I have mine, so let's do it in the kitchen

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I am sick of pretty girls, I want something sick smelly disgusting, fat or anorexic, with a personality that kills flowers and that makes me vomit... I guess you will have to do for now. :( Moral: At least she was not the perfect match huh? Always look at the bright side of eternal darkness.

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Hey Baby, Whats your name? Dave ...(silence)...

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-You are so lovely. -DOES NOT COMPUTE...

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Hey, do you want to dance? No.

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haha

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#1 You're breath smells like Skittles, can I taste the rainbow? No, because , while mine may smell like Skittles, yours reeks. #2 Girl: Hey, I got this new Kiss Proof lip gloss, wanna try it out? (there are 2 answers to this) 1.Boy: Well, yours may be Kiss Proof, but mines not, and I don't have time to re-apply this after 2. Yeah, I do want to try it out, but not with you.

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Im gonna rape you..

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Hey baby wanna come back to my place? Goo-goo ga-ga

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

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Guy: Can we go on a date? Girl: A date? You couldn't find a date if I handed you a bag of fruit!

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Didnt I just meet you at world of warcraft? My nickname is desperaterapist838493

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Did it hurt? When you fell from the hoe tree and banged every dick on the way down?

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you look fap-fap-fap-fabulous

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-- Hey, can I have your number? -- 12

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Do your parents have Down Syndrome? Because your really special.

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What's worse than walking on a beach? Not walking on a beach.

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Here, flowers for a pretty lady. These arent flowers they are leaves. Well you arent a pretty lady so hah!

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Are your parents retarded? Because you're something special

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Woman: lol you are get nervous when I speak to you! Man: Yeah, I get nervous when fucking ugly attention seeking bitches speak to me, nothing personal its just you being a fucking ugly attention seeking bitch which happens to be speaking to me. Moral: Flawless Victory.

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Female: Hey do you wann- Male: You got a purty mouth

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Girl, you must have fallen from heaven...because you're dead.

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I have been known to give women the best fake orgasms ever ;)

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Guy: (Walks up to girl) "I do not think it is a girls body that makes her special, it is her personality that really counts". Girl: "Well that's to bad because you can't have sex with my personality". (Then walks away)

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!