- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Guy: Are you looking for a hot, sexy, fertile young man? Girl: No thanks, I used to be one.

Him: Has anyone ever told you that you are absolutely beautifull...?? Her: (smiles) and says no.. Him: there is a good reaseon for that..

i would traval the earth for you. well then im going to the moon.

My dog just died so now you're my only Bitch.

Jdkfk

"Hey, I have the feeling i've seen you before somewhere..." "Well, could be, I used to be a porn actress.

male: hey wanna ride female: STRANGER DANGER!

If you were attacked by a bear with chainsaw arms i hope it stays away from your face, because I think you're cute.

Do you have an STD? No. DO you want one??

My penis becomes hard and hard when I see your mom, but weak when I see you.

Every girl wants to be swept off her feet... It's when you put her in the trunk of your car that she starts to freak out.

-Want to get on your knees and suck my dick? -No thanks, I have enough Tic Tacs at home.

At a bar... sigh... Woman: Hey cutie wanna go home? "Man" hello I am twelve... what is this? Moral: Hello I am eight... what is this?

"Can I buy you a drink or do I have to have sex with you first?"

- If you were a booger I'd pick you first - If you were a booger I'd throw you away...

GIRL: I bet you say that to all the girls you meet. MAN: How much you want to bet? No wait, I better not make that bet. (or) MAN: Only half the ones I get this far in conversation with. The other half are a little bit easier to get in bed with.

Man: Hey, I'm Red. You like to walk? Woman: No. I prefer to run. Away from you

Roses are red violets are blue this isn't a poem I'm a botanist.

Id catch a grenade for ya, but you won't do the same

Are you from Tennessee? Because we are both in Tennessee and I thought asking where you grew up would be a good way to get to know you better.

Man, stay alive, I dont even got time to read that shit. See you around son.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book