Q: Why are Italian girls so hairy? A: Because it turns out its a genetic predisposition in which almost all males and females have when of the Italian ethnicity, these genetics are also parts of other race types.

Male: Are you from Tennessee? Female: Why? Male: Cus you look like an inbred hick

Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

-Hey comon baby dont be shy give me a little BlowJob -sorry im alergic to peanuts....

-Are you the sun? -No.. Why? -Because you need to stay 93,000,000 miles away from me.

-Do you come here often? -Yeah, but now that you're here, I think I'll find another bar.

And then it hit me...no really now I'm bleeding

It's not Rapee If you yell surprise!

BOY: Are you a chicken? GIRL: Why? BOY: Because I'll like you to lay on my eggs all day...

Dude: Do you have insurance on you ass? Gal: Why? Dude: Because Im about to hit it. Gal: I hope you have insurance on your face (punch).

A. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. B. Oh really? Well, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put N and O together. Oh wait -- they're already there. Huh.

If you were my daughter id still be bathing you

A 85 year old man was at a bar, he goes up to the first hot thing he sees and asks do I come here often?

Hey, you want a ride?

If I could rearange the alphabet id put "I-W-A-N-T-S-E-X-Y-O-U together. SIr, not really but that was kinda impressive. Me: I know...

Are you a Geodude? Cause you're face is rockin'!

- hey id like my order for you - ok we put extra punch with it these days

I AM FAGNETO! WELCOME TO GAY!

man: would u please me with a blowjob girl: cant u be romantic ? man: would please me with a blowjob at the sunset

Boy: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? Girl: Did it hurt when you were thrust through the ash-filled layers of Hell?

Man, stay alive, I dont even got time to read that shit. See you around son.

Hey girl, you a single mom I heard, I love that. Really? :D SURE! Hey just between us, how sexy are your kids on a scale from one to over nine thousand? Moral: Watch out ladies, I can only take care of so many of you... (you have kids? Meh, get lost,nothing personal, just you know... your kid)

-Go on don't be shy, Ask me out. -Okay Go out.

man-hey baby you wanna go somewhere girl-no thanks hells over there

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!