I have the smallest erected dick in town, if you don't believe me ask my mama!

Girlfriend: you are much more naive when you are naked, and a small penis, no hair and are 23 years old

—do you believe in love at first sight or shall I come back again? —no, and I think you shall not come back ever.

-Do you mind if i smoke? -No. I dont even mind if you burn....

Did you just fart? Cause it smells like shit in here

Adventures of Drunken man with standards 2: Man: Well you are kinda uh... big for me... no offense lady, I mean you are sexy but you are... well fat.. in fact you are TRUCKING HUGE! and I have standards, HIGH STANDARDS ACTUALLY... but since you are so charming and have such a great personality... I guess we can go for it... Kid: Mommy... what is that naked man doing to that blimp? Moral: Standards... we all got them... they are invisible for a reason though...

Let's not turn this rape... into a murder

male-"Do you have a rape fetish?" fenale-"No, i don't" male-"Ohh... Well you're not going enjoy this."

Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

If you were Mufasa I'd help scar push you off the ledge

Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

You smell just like my mom...

She - Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? becuase your-- He - I did not fall from heaven, you ignorant little twat.

-Hey sit on my face and I will guess your weight

- hey baby i wanna show you something - wait i wanna show you something too -what is it? -my fists

Farewell to thy, you have been most amusing. Moral: Has left the building.

It's not Rapee If you yell surprise!

You must be a parking ticket. Because you are dressed like i'd have to pay.

Man: Well... you seem female enough at least... wanna come home? Woman?: Uh... well... okay ;) But I am a man thought ;) Man: That is disgusting! I am so ashamed! Not Woman: Oh, well sorry :(.. Man: So... as I said you SEEM female enough so wanna come home? The other man: :D I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU ASKED ME! ITS SO BEAUTIFUL... so well... NO! Man: This is not getting anywhere is it? Author. NO!

Man: Oh.. girl you smell so nice... Girl: TRY ANOTHER LINE AND STOP LOOKING AT MY TlTS LOSER! Man: Uh... I am blind... Girl: Um...

Hey you've got the most beautiful f*cked up teeth I've ever seen.

If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd probably leave it as is, seems to be working OK just fine without my internvention. And imagine the work it'd create in terms of all the re-filing alone. Librarians would have apoplexy, and if I came out I was responsible..well, there'd be hell to pay. No, thank you, but no thank you, the alphabet can stay as it is, no matter how hot your body.

Roses are red, Violets are Blue, Dont talk to me, and I wont talk to you.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I right next to each other. You say that you want me? Well don't what you come for!!

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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