Guy- Hey girl do u like math Girl-um, sure Guy- ok I got a problem... Add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and multiply the bodies.... What does that equal.... Girl- u and ur homo friends

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Man: Well... you seem female enough at least... wanna come home? Woman?: Uh... well... okay ;) But I am a man thought ;) Man: That is disgusting! I am so ashamed! Not Woman: Oh, well sorry :(.. Man: So... as I said you SEEM female enough so wanna come home? The other man: :D I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU ASKED ME! ITS SO BEAUTIFUL... so well... NO! Man: This is not getting anywhere is it? Author. NO!

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This tux is rented by the hour, are you?

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Adventures of Drunken man with standards 2: Man: Well you are kinda uh... big for me... no offense lady, I mean you are sexy but you are... well fat.. in fact you are TRUCKING HUGE! and I have standards, HIGH STANDARDS ACTUALLY... but since you are so charming and have such a great personality... I guess we can go for it... Kid: Mommy... what is that naked man doing to that blimp? Moral: Standards... we all got them... they are invisible for a reason though...

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-Hey sit on my face and I will guess your weight

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Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

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Did you just fart? Cause it smells like shit in here

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? We are both religious figures at the head of our places of worship.

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Woman: Hey you look hot and cool, wanna chat? "Man": Meh.. I just stand here with my beerglass trying to look cool in hopes that women ask me out... Woman: UGH! "Man": May I please come with you? Eh... where are you going... HEY! Moral: Trying to look like James Bond in the darkest corner of a bar is not flirting you trucking moron!

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I have the smallest erected dick in town, if you don't believe me ask my mama!

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue, Dont talk to me, and I wont talk to you.

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If you were Mufasa I'd help scar push you off the ledge

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Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

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Do you have sunburn, or are you always this hot? It's sunburn.

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Man: Oh.. girl you smell so nice... Girl: TRY ANOTHER LINE AND STOP LOOKING AT MY TlTS LOSER! Man: Uh... I am blind... Girl: Um...

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-Do you come here often? -Yeah, but now that you're here, I think I'll find another bar.

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If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd probably leave it as is, seems to be working OK just fine without my internvention. And imagine the work it'd create in terms of all the re-filing alone. Librarians would have apoplexy, and if I came out I was responsible..well, there'd be hell to pay. No, thank you, but no thank you, the alphabet can stay as it is, no matter how hot your body.

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Farewell to thy, you have been most amusing. Moral: Has left the building.

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Man: Do you like a sensitive guy? Women: Yeah, I used to be one.

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It's not Rapee If you yell surprise!

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You smell just like my mom...

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- hey baby i wanna show you something - wait i wanna show you something too -what is it? -my fists

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Hey you've got the most beautiful f*cked up teeth I've ever seen.

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male-"Do you have a rape fetish?" fenale-"No, i don't" male-"Ohh... Well you're not going enjoy this."

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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