boy - would you like to dance? girl - hell no! boy - I think you misunderstood me. I said you look fat in those pants. girl - That's why I said "Hell No!" girl - I'm trying to deny the fact that I look fat in my pants. boy - damnit! girl - Phew!

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- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

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"Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!" "My parole officer would go nuts!"

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Order Online Nightwear and short shop online in India

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GEDDINTHEFRIGGENCAR

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause you d*** sure look like a demon!

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Guy: Do you wanna be the sun of my life? Girl: Ok sure Guy: Then go stand 13. billion miles away from me

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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A blond, a brunette and a black haired girl are all stuck on an island....stupid women.

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I told my wife I met someone who looked just like her she asked Was she gorgeous I didn't know what to say.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because he dropped his hamster in the garbage disposal

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I lost my phone number, can I have yours?

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Man: Your body is a temple! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

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You allergic to semen?

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Famous male actors guide on pick-up. 1. Enter Disco. 2. Say hello out loud. 3. By this point you`re screwed... literally.

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At a bar (how creative): Man: I bet you look beautiful behind those tits... Woman: WHAT DO YOU MEAN DONKEYHOLE!?!?!?! Man: Uh... well I mean I really cant see your face and... Moral: Silicone tits are nice too... in MODERATION FFS!

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- Professor Dumbledore, where are we? - You're dead, stupid. Snape trolled you.

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Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

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Woman- is your penis erect? Male- no just FULL SIZED Woman- woah

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"Are you my Appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me feel like I should take you out." "I charge $80 with anesthesia, $40 without."

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that shirt looks nice on you, it would look better on the floor

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are you from tennessee? because your license plate said it.

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Aww seriously dude? That would be awesome, gotta warn you though, this car repair dude, is really ripping my shirt off but you know, ill send you the bill. 666 (my phone is on the charger, get me a new one and ill write a fucking essay about my sisters ass and post it here I really need a phone)

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Female: Hey can i buy you a drink? Male: I have AIDS.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!