I have never dated a horse-faced woman before :)

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rapee? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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What's your favorite condiment? Mine's mayonaise.

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Waiter- For you, sir? Male: I'll have a Strawberry Daquiri, non-alcoholic, please. Waiter- And, for your company? Male: For her, a long-island-iced-tea, with a twist of Rohypnol.

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You look just like my sister! That's funny,... CUZ IM A DUDE

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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Hey baby, can I cream in your chocolate?

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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Man: There is a U and I in beautiful Woman: Ya, but there is only a U in ugly

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- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

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Man: Hey you look good enough to do Woman: Oh really because so does my 8 foot boyfriend. Man: ... Woman: Do you want me to pick him up from the gym?

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does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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Hey :) Hi Do you like me? :) No :'( You never asked if i loved you... Awhhhh do you love me :) No

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Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I would be in prison.

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Man: Is your name sherly? Woman: No... Man: because id like to Fuc* you in the ass and call you sherly

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You're like a can of condensed milk. Short, thick, and sweet.

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HE: You must have some hot buns. SHE: Yeah? HE: Cause you got a real butterface to go with them.

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HONEY! I SEE MEDUSA!!!!!!!!!!! oh wait, it was just you

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Man: I wanna know what love iiiiiiis... And I want you to show meeeeeeeeee! *Woman slams man with baseball bat* Man: Urgh... ARGH MY FACE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE! WHYYYY! Woman: I love baseball! Moral: Stupid singing idiot, if that is not the worst pick up line ever, then some other is!

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He: How do you like your eggs in the morning? She: Unfertilised!

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Sigh... No I do not have a van... Just get in the plane!

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Hey baby wana come over for dinner? Sure whats cookin? Your dead body after I kill ur ugly face derrp

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"Are you a parking ticket?" "What?" "You’ve got fine written all over you"

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A. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. B. Oh really? Well, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put N and O together. Oh wait -- they're already there. Huh.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!