Guy: Is it hot in here or did i just break the ice? Girl: No, it was your weight.

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There must be an angel missing from Heaven, because I've got it tied up in my basement. (It keeps saying something about a fancy dress party, but I'm not falling for that one again; that's how Batman escaped.)

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Keep it classy! Man: Hello mylady may I be as rude as to say you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen? Girl: Oh, wow I mean such class! Man: Yes you see, I am only asking... You see, would you mind a bit of some violent rapage? Girl: How dare you! Man: Oh I mean not be rude mylady, just a bit of torture and some few stylish cuts with my fancy knife? Moral: Whatever you do, whatever you want, KEEP IT CLASSY!

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"I'd like to get you out of those clothes. Really, they aren't very flattering. That color looks awful on you and those pants make you look fat."

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Hey bitch wanna fuck! SURE! Nah you too sleasy. Moral: And the masters of the universe.

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Man: Your so hot, i think heavens missing an angel Girl: ... Man: ... Girl: ... Girl 2: Sophie turn your hearing aid on Man: oooh.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -To get to the other side.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. When I take a shit I think about you bitch *flushes the toilet*

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H3LL0 Girls, You need some THERAPEY? Call Nero The Moralman For A qualified TheRapist. The number? You wont get it, so then you will go mad with lust and need therapey Moral: Ooooh... I says ANTI Pickup line... Whats that? More Moral: Nothing is immoral! Everything is Moral MORAL MAN!

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-Your father must be an alien because your out of this world -More like out of your league

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Man: Is your name sherly? Woman: No... Man: because id like to Fuc* you in the ass and call you sherly

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did it hurt ? did what hurt? when your fell from heaven? because it looks like you landed on your face :O

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i want a blowjob bitch *lifts her hijab*

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-"Hey babe, you gotta nice ass!" -"Yep, and it doesn't like a rude one staring at it."

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Girl, did it hurt when you got dragged up all the way from hell? Moral: The hell with morals!

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- you're so fat! - I know you are, but what am I? -awwww, thanks man!!! -I didn't mean it like that!

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Guy:I got stds! Wanna do it? Girl:what the f*** did u just say?guy:oh std ummmm save the dogs?uh ya that save the dogs I own a animal shelter! Girl:I'm not stupid guy: u sure? (Slap)

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Your hair is really beautiful. Thanks. Can I make a wig out of it?

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-Good afternoon miss, would you care to try our new line of perfume? -Sure what's it called? -Chloroform...

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If you were a booger i'd pick you first. -that, is fucking disgusting.

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You seem reasonably clean, which is always an important consideration for me when selecting a woman.

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Do Your feet hurt? Cause youve been stomping on my dreams for 3 years now

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I can tell you are single. How? Because you're ugly

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!