I hope you want kids, cause i've left my condoms at my girlfriends place.

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Tenth year anniversary Marriage. So what was your name again? Annoying Bitch? Old Hag? I forgot...

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-Good thing I brought my library card, 'cause I'm checking you out! -What a shame, it's expired.

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guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together Girl: Its a good thing N and O are already together

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What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

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- So, wanna go back to my place? - Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock? -That depends on the size of the rock. -You don't really get it, do you? -Get what?

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You seem reasonably clean, which is always an important consideration for me when selecting a woman.

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Tenth year anniversary female edition: Love, for each day my love grows stronger for you. Too bad honey, I married a old man and was hoping you would be dead by now. Oh! What a shock! Do you really mean that? Sigh... No, whispers: I was just hoping that would give you a stroke that's all) What was that last thing you said? Nothing "dear" Moral: Cyanide, just mash the seeds of six apples, use a syringe and presto! Dead family!

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Girl: Do you know any good movies? Boy: Snakes on a plane Girl: Whats it about? Boy: It's about Horses.. on a boat.

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Male: "Why does it feel like the most beautiful girl in the world is in this room?" Female: "Because you're here"

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"Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material." "I'm vegan."

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I really should start saying "congratulations" instead of "are you keeping it?"

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Hi! Do you like fat guys with no money?

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It's not Rape* If you yell surprise.

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A couple wanted to try something different in the bedroom, The wife suggests they do it in a 69 position so they get into position but the wife lets one off in the husbands face she apologises and they try again when the wife farts again the husband gets up to leave and says no I don't think I can do this another 67 times!

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If I asked you out on a date, would your answer to that question be the same as your answer to this question?

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WHEN I ACTUALLY DIE SOME PEOPLE ARE GOING TO GET REALLY HAUNTED. Originally Posted at: Collection of Funny WhatsApp Status

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hey your pretty... pretty ugly!

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Hello my name is Pogo. Would you like to jump on my stick?

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Have you ever heard of World of Warcraft?

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At a bar: Hello! Moral: Keep the damn lines short! (A moral man original, not to be confused with the exploding bar or whoever put morals in their sstories, feel free to do so though! I mean anyone can see from the quality whose are mine ;)

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Whenever I look at stars I think of you... Because your only beatiful from a distance.

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Man: Your so hot, i think heavens missing an angel Girl: ... Man: ... Girl: ... Girl 2: Sophie turn your hearing aid on Man: oooh.

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Are you jamacian? Cause your jamacian me crazy? no you're a fucking whore

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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