Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

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You look just like my sister! That's funny,... CUZ IM A DUDE

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Women love it when you kiss their neck. Just not while they are driving and while you're in the back seat and when they don't know you...

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Guy: I got you a gift. It's a Necklace. Girl: Awww thats so nice. Guy: BAZINGA Its my dick.

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Flipping a coin to give you my number or not to give you my number

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-Your father must be an alien because your out of this world -More like out of your league

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GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

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I have never dated a horse-faced woman before :)

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the word of the day is legs lets go to your house and spread the word

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me- hey baby wanna hve sexual intercourse girl- sure because using the word intercourse in a sentence tunrs me on.

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Woman- is your penis erect? Male- no just FULL SIZED Woman- woah

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Ay Girl. Lemme squirtle on yo jigglypuffs

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Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

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what's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?

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F: I AM SO DRUNK AND HORNY I COULD FUCK ANYONE M: Hey, wanna fuck? F: I SAID ANYONE.. Not anything... Heck I got standards! Moral: Heck she has standards! Her dog is someone!

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2 fake blondes hitting on me. blondes: we're twins! me: so where are you from? blonde1: canada! blonde2 (at the same time): finland!

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Do you why I know we're going to have sex tonight?

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Man: HELP! I am dying of disease and have only one day left to live! My only wish... "sob" is to procreate... to have a son or a daughter... Woman: Aww... well maybe I can help you... Man: :D I cant believe it (tears in eyes) Woman: What are you dying of? Man: Aids... Woman proceeds to disappear in a ball of smoke. Moral of the story: Dunno find it yourself ffs I dont even know why people read this crap... funny typing it though.. thumbs ups for that :D

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MAN- You're trying to imagine me naked aren't you? WOMAN- No. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

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Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I would be in prison.

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Sorry, I don't wanna date a guy who's best pickup line is cocaine.

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Are you from tennessee? Because your inbred and retarted.

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Superman: I bet I can bang you faster than the speed of light! Woman: OOOOH! OK DO IT! Superman... uh... I already did it 30 times already... "pant" "pant" Woman: uh... really? Uh... was I suppose to feel anythi... Moral: Since when has fast sex been good sex?

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Damn gurl, are you a microwave? Cause for sure you are burning me hot.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!