- I think i lost my number, can i have yours? - I think i lost my number too.

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roses are red violets are twisted bend over b**** your about to get fisted

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Boy: can i have your number? Jewish girl *pulls up sleeve*

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I have a gun.

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Do you wanna be a pirate ship? Because there can be tons of seamen inside of you.

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What happend to the blue duck that had purple and pink stars on it ? Nothing happend to the blue dick that had purple and pink stars on it Wait A second...

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Okay, I lied, the one below actually kinda works, people get impressed, it is quite the accomplishment you know... But since I am gonna get married soon I don't pick up as much as I should anyways. Moral: Man

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Hey Baby, Whats your name? Dave ...(silence)...

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fancy going halves on a bastard?

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Hey this is crazy and I just met you so here's the kitchen a sandwich maybe?

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- you come here often? -i used to until you came here

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The word of today is "leg's",no whom are i kidding, bird is the word!

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Dating tips 101: First you find a girl that likes you. Then you realize no girl likes you. Moral: Lesson done.

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I'll drop my standards, if you drop your pants ;)

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I wouldn't.

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Me about four years ago: Girl: So what do you do? Me: I am an author. Girl: Cool! So like what do you write and stuff? Me: I am on my third book I am writing for Tom Clancy. Girl: Get outta here! You are so full of shit! This kinda happened a lot of times actually. ...Its true, then he died, now I am trying to rewrite the whole piece of crap into science fiction, yeah! Come sue me CLANCY! Do you think ANYBODY thought that you could write like 732 books a year? (Even though they where pieces of shit, I would know, mine are still the worst rated, but not worst selling because I dont know)

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Excuse me, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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"My mom won't be home for hours..."

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why was the girl stupid beacuse she had brain sergy

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Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

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"I lost my virginity! Can I have yours?"

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-Your eyes are as blue as toilet water

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At a cemetery: Girl: This place is so creepy at night... I should have left sooner... Man: RAWRGH! BRAAAAAAAAAAINS!!!!!!! Girl: EEEEEEEEEEEEK! (runs away) Man *takes off makeup and fake blood* Man; Well, I guess that did not work... Moral: If they dont like you while you are alive, there are always un-dead options...

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Male: are you from Tennessee? Female: yes, why? Male: because Tennessee has great food. Do you think we could travel there together.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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