- if I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U next to Y, just why

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Her: Guess what? Him: What? Her Yo Mama! Him: Is she that slut i did last night?

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Do you have Groupon? *wait for response* Because you look fucking cheap

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"Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

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Guy: Can I have your number ? Girl: We are six.

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hey Herpes Go Away!

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If you were homework, I would slam you on my table and do you all night long.

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-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? -I'm an atheist.

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Still a better love story than Twilight

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M: You make me wanna be a terrorist! W: Why? M: I so wanna blow on you right now...

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Nice legs what time do they open

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Guy: I lost my phone number, Can I have yours? Girl: Your phone service would help you get a new one.

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In the USA: Man: Hello, I am half Iraq and half Afghanistan, my name is Osama Bin Allah! Girl: Oh... Uh em... I do not mind you nor anything but, you are like uh... civilized and stuff right? Just asking! Man: Of course miss, so how many camels to get into your pussy? Girl: OMG! Man: WAIT YOU MISHEAR ME! I SAY HOW MANY CARAMELS TO GET INTO YOUR... never mind... Moral: Seriously just give up, this must be the worst "pickupline" ever

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It's not rape if you say "Surprise!"

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*is your name angel cuz that's all i see? *is your name asshole cuz that's all i see

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Did anyone ever tell you you smell like Catalina? Did anyone ever tell you you smell like a cat?

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Jack is riding his new yellow bicycle. His father bought it for his 12th anniversary. Jack is ecstatic to have his first ride down his street. Erick thinks its ugly.

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-I wish i were DNA helicase so i could unzip your genes. -You're a loser

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I like your shirt, it would look better in my pants

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Dont blame me for using moral all the time its just part of my sig...nature XD Moral: Not a pick up line, so its pretty anti.

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why cant you comb your hair cuz you got cancer othere guy :ahahahaah fag

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Hold me pint love i'm going for a dump.

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Hey bitch wanna fuck! SURE! Nah you too sleasy. Moral: And the masters of the universe.

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Ay girl, those jeans make your ass look fat. Now I'ma get you pregnant while you make breakfast.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!