Want to get a pizza and fuck? What you don't like pizza?

I'd take you to the zoo but you might be mistaken for an elephant

*At a concert* guy- hey if you were that drum set, i'd bang you on that stage all night

You must be a parking ticket. Because you are dressed like i'd have to pay.

Man; Wanna play the rape game? Girl; No Man; That's the spirit

Is that a mirror in your pocket? because I can... Yes actually, it's my new LCD Mirror Screen Protector for my iPhone.

If you were Mufasa I'd help scar push you off the ledge

Guy:Are you wearing space pants, cause that ass is out of this world! Girl:No, they're baseball pants, cuz this ass is out of your league.

Did you fall from heaven? Cause you d*** sure look like a demon!

roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

I stole this pickup line from Antipickupline.com.

Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

are you from tennessee? because your license plate said it.

Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

B: Can I have your number ? G: Sure.. 666

-Hey sit on my face and I will guess your weight

He: Did it hurt? She: Aww when I fell from heaven? Thanks! He: No, when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. She:...

Man: Hello! I am SUPERMAN! And you are so hot you are my Kryptonite! Woman: then you better get lost before you die! Man: Uh well... yeah uh... walks away (in non super speed strangely) Moral: Think things trough sometimes...

Hey you've got the most beautiful f*cked up teeth I've ever seen.

Hey did you fall from Heaven? Cos I think you are angel. If I'd fallen from anywhere that high I'd be in hospital with serious injuries or dead. Do the logic.

Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

male-"Do you have a rape fetish?" fenale-"No, i don't" male-"Ohh... Well you're not going enjoy this."

- I'd do anything for you. - Die.

This tux is rented by the hour, are you?

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!