Man: Is your name sherly? Woman: No... Man: because id like to Fuc* you in the ass and call you sherly

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Man - I know I don't look like much now, but I'm drinking milk. Woman - Not mine!

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- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

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You look just like my sister! That's funny,... CUZ IM A DUDE

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Man: I wanna know what love iiiiiiis... And I want you to show meeeeeeeeee! *Woman slams man with baseball bat* Man: Urgh... ARGH MY FACE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE! WHYYYY! Woman: I love baseball! Moral: Stupid singing idiot, if that is not the worst pick up line ever, then some other is!

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rapee? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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My friend and I flipped a coin to see who will ask you out and I won.

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- Are you from Tennessee bec- - Yes

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Want to get a pizza and fuck? What you don't like pizza?

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-So...wanna come back to my place? -I Dont Know If two people can fit in a box on the street.

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- Hello There Pretty Lady! - Hi... - Wow, your the fist girl I've met who has bigger boobs than I do! - Tw*t

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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Hey girl, I am a rich guy with a huge estate and stuff, while you live under a cardboard box so... Your place or mine? Both, I to your place, and you to mine.

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You are the personification of beauty. ,..Wanna Shag?

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He: How do you like your eggs in the morning? She: Unfertilised!

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Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: Ascending from hell and breaking through the earth's crust.

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A. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. B. Oh really? Well, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put N and O together. Oh wait -- they're already there. Huh.

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guy: hey baby come join the PEN15 club with mee ;) girl: whats that?? guy: come and i will show you...*goes into the guys restroom with her*....lets go to the restroom and never rest...except you can rest on my PEN15

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I have a knife, Maddie. Get in the van.

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Hey baby wana come over for dinner? Sure whats cookin? Your dead body after I kill ur ugly face derrp

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Order Online Nightwear and short shop online in India

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M: Hey bitch i'll give you £50 to touch my penis. f: Simon thats an afterschool detention M: SCORE!

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"Are you a parking ticket?" "What?" "You’ve got fine written all over you"

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what's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!