Hey baby wana come over for dinner? Sure whats cookin? Your dead body after I kill ur ugly face derrp

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- Are you from Tennessee bec- - Yes

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Can I go to your house and play with your Jigglypuff?

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-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? -I'm an atheist.

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What happens when a drunk swedish man prank calls 911 from a local bar? The ambulance comes

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Girl, now I want you to be on top! Okay, what position? DOGGY STYLE! Moral: Sickman Fraud, with that name smart people should listen with one eye open, while geniuses keep their eyes and ears shut.

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hey girl, whats your sign? slippery when wet.

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Dating post: "Nice male looking for female company, I have a steady job and would prefer if you too had a job, you will be particularity happy if you have a small penis fetish. Signed BIGPENIS19INCHESJIMlight sleeper

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Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

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"Are you my Appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me feel like I should take you out." "I charge $80 with anesthesia, $40 without."

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-Hey, what's your sign? -I don't know, but yours must be Cancer.

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-As I slipped my finger in her hole I could feel her getting wetter and wetter, When I pulled it out she was going down on me. I should probably start looking for a new boat...

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men: Do you ride horses, because I'd let you ride me all night!

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You're like a can of condensed milk. Short, thick, and sweet.

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2 fake blondes hitting on me. blondes: we're twins! me: so where are you from? blonde1: canada! blonde2 (at the same time): finland!

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- Hey, I have 40 minutes to live and need to feel the touch of a woman to live. -I'm a dude.

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Hello children! :D

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Man: Comon babe a little BJ wont hurt anyone get down..... Woman: sorry im alergic to peanuts

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-Why is one breast bigger than the other? -because I popped it and all the silicone leaked out

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guy: hey baby come join the PEN15 club with mee ;) girl: whats that?? guy: come and i will show you...*goes into the guys restroom with her*....lets go to the restroom and never rest...except you can rest on my PEN15

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I have a knife, Maddie. Get in the van.

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: What? Him: When you fell out of the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down?

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Waiter- For you, sir? Male: I'll have a Strawberry Daquiri, non-alcoholic, please. Waiter- And, for your company? Male: For her, a long-island-iced-tea, with a twist of Rohypnol.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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