- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

he: hey,do you have a phone? she: yeah! why,do you want it? he: no,you should consider selling it and doing a plastic surgery with the money.

Are you from Tennessee? Youre the only 10 i see, and im 59. I bet we could 69 beautifully.

Boy: does your face hurt Girl: No. Why Boy Because it sure is hurting me

Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

If your happy and you know it clap your hands!! What if I lost my hands in Nam while I was singing this song and a plane killed my friend causing me to ct off both of my hands?

Guy: If I could rearange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together Girl: If I could rearange the alphabet, I'd put F and U together

He i would love to have sex with you She. I know but you have aids

excuse me my eyes are up here thats great........where are your nipples

Did it hurt? When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down?

There's a reason why they call my penis the Bunker Buster.

-Hi miss are you a catchup? -hey is this some corny pick-up line?,,,okay fine. why? -because I want to dip my hotdog to you

Man: GET IN THE VAN! Woman: NO! Man: Well... How about the Limo? Its got beverages and caviar and... Woman: OOH :D Moral: Always go for the limo first,

On a scale from 1 to 10, can I get your number?

Criminals are even more smarter these days My wife woke me up in the middle of the night and said that there were burglars downstairs so I went quietly looking for them when I realised I'm not married

Whatever I'll just date myself.

Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

M: Woah I am drunk baby... But I gotta say... you`re the hottest bitch in town! B: Bark bark!

men: Do you ride horses, because I'd let you ride me all night!

Guy: Hey, I think you're really sweet... Girl: Aww, thanks Guy: Is that why you're so fat?

I'll eat your poop

Guy: Where have you been all my life? Girl: In my room hiding from you.

Hey big girl ;), why you alone? You ate all of your friends?

Husband: Honey, I heard that when you die, you come back as a different creature! Wife: Really!? I want to come back as a cow!! Husband: You're obviously not listening.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book