Hey big girl ;), why you alone? You ate all of your friends?

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On a scale from 1 to 10, can I get your number?

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Man: I am willing to give my life for you. Woman: How about you fucking get one instead and rather seek me out then? Moral: M-M-M-Morale breaker!

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Hey i got a job for you. But it blows.

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My friends just bet me 50 dollars that I couldn't pick you up if I came over and spoke with you, would you like a few free drinks on their money?

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boy: hey wanna hang out some time?! girl: O MY GOD! r u hannah montanna?!

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Did you gain weight? Because I think your gravitational pull towards me just increased.

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Wanna come home to my star destroyer and play with my lightsaber? No? How about just a trip down the Enterprise bridge to have fun with my romulans?... if you know what I mean? ;) ;)

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I'm desperate, you'll do.

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Man: Hey you female? Cuz I am a horny man and... *door slams*

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why did the boy laugh? A:he saw another boy get raped by a giant scorpian

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- Hey, I have 40 minutes to live and need to feel the touch of a woman to live. -I'm a dude.

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Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

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Man: Hey, you dont look that fucking ugly, wanna go home with me? mirror: *shatters* Moral: If your ugliness ever shatters your mirror let me know, ill look at it and it will assemble itself back on its own.

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-Did you just fart? Cause you blew me away.

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(boy gives flowers to a girl) Girl: Are these for me? Boy: Nope, I just want you to hold them for me for a second..

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Hey gorgeous what are you drinking? Cyanide.

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You look just like my sister! That's funny,... CUZ IM A DUDE

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"I'd like to get you out of those clothes. Really, they aren't very flattering. That color looks awful on you and those pants make you look fat."

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Hey lady, you're really, really cute! Let's go out in the woods, GET NAKED and have sex!

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F: I AM SO DRUNK AND HORNY I COULD FUCK ANYONE M: Hey, wanna fuck? F: I SAID ANYONE.. Not anything... Heck I got standards! Moral: Heck she has standards! Her dog is someone!

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Man: Your body is a tempe! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

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I have one thing to say to all the woman who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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-Hi miss are you a ketchup? -hey is this some corny pick-up line?,,,okay fine. why? -because I want to dip my hot dog to you

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!