Hold me pint love i'm going for a dump.

"Are you my Appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me feel like I should take you out." "I charge $80 with anesthesia, $40 without."

- If i could rearange the alphabet i'd puit you and i together. - That's not necessary because N and O are already together.

Man: Yoyoyoy my lady wanna get some? Mirror: yoyoyoy my lady wanna get some? Man: SHIET!!! This never works! Moral: Take a look at yourself before you break yourself! By the time you start looking, sounding, feeling and even smelling awesome in the mirror, then the girls will feel the same way about you, no kidding.

-Your the hottest girl i have ever met -I'm a man

GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

Every breath you take Every move you make Every bond you break Every step you take I'll be watching you Every single day Every word you say Every game you play Every night you stay I'll be watching you

Your so hot my pants will explode if I don't take them off now...

http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

Do you why I know we're going to have sex tonight?

Man enters bar and does a lot of magic tricks, all the prettiest women are extremely impressed: Girls: WOW! We would do anything to see more of that! Guy: Uh... damn I forgot what to do after this... Moral: Screw the game man, its a stupid book, just be your moronic self and someone will like you for the lovely disgusting moron that you are... by the way you lost the game :D

You seem rapable enough... wanna see some back alleys with me?

Man with huge arms and HUGE muscles enters a... pub! (for variety`s sake) "Hey you like fisting!" Woman: Yeah kinda.. I mean HOLY SHIT NO! I DONT PLEASE STOP NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH! Moral: Get a room you two! (a moral man original)

Hey ladies ;) I like to post lots of anti-pickuplines! ;) Girls: WOW! I WANNA JOIN YOU HOME! ME TOO ME TOO! The anti-part: This will never happen in real life.

Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

My friends just bet me 50 dollars that I couldn't pick you up if I came over and spoke with you, would you like a few free drinks on their money?

If you were a booger i'd pick you first. -that, is fucking disgusting.

Would you like to be the lone mother of my children?

Male: are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. Female: no, I'm from Idaho. Because I da ho.

Pointless truth? Man: Hey, there is always a really slutty dressed woman at every bar with a cowboy hat, fake tits and really spread legs, why? Woman: To get ignored. Moral: SUUUUUUUUUUUUURE!

Male: Did it hurt??? Female: What, when I fell from heaven? Male: No, the first time you did anal!!!

Man: Lust is a terrible thing! Woman: I agree. Man: So come home with me and help me get rid of it.

You have a laugh like my favorite porn star.

What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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